Thursday, July 21, 2022

Dear Penthouse Forum: As a New York Times Op-Ed Writer I Never Thought I’d Be Writing to You About the Time I Was Naughtybad, but Then...

So New York Times op-ed columnists were given an assignment to "revisit their incorrect predictions and bad advice — and reflect on why they changed their minds."

Well, "given" is probably too strong a word, since history has shown again and again that no one at the Times exercises any control over anything the op-eders write.  Let's say "suggested".

Anyway, Ross Douthat apparently prayerfully considered the matter, burned through several rosaries, and when no wrong opinion of his came to mind, he blew the assignment off and went skinny dipping at Lourdes.

For sheer groveling hilarity, I'd have to give Bret "Bug" Stephens the prize for his extended Fish Called Wanda-level mea culpa -- 

-- about how terribly wrong he was about Trump voters.  

Now that he has takes a closer look he can see that they're not racist mouth breathers at all.  They're actually lovely, patriotic, nuanced thinkers and he deeply regrets ever suggesting otherwise, so could they please stop stuffing him in his gym locker and taking his lunch money.  After all, given that one brief aside that Barack Obama said off the record that one time, how could they help but line up to vote for the King of the Birthers and stay dog-loyal to the American Fascist Party as it plunges ever deeper into madness and depravity?  

Oh, and whatabout the Russia hoax, huh?  Huh?  Whatabout that, ya damn, anti-Trump hypocrites!

From Mr. David Brooks' column we learn that he was young once, and then went to school, and then "America: A Land of Contrasts", and then got hired by the Wall Street Journal to write GOP talking points and mock Liberals, and then went to Moscow, and then yadda yadda stuff happened --who even remembers?  It's all a blur -- and then The New York Times hired him and having written a zillion columns about OMG!Deficits! and how Stoopid Liberals wanna spend too much money on people and stuff, well, maybe his priorities --     

I called around to my right-leaning economist friends and they sensed inequality was a problem, but few had done much work on the subject or done much thinking on how to address it.

 --  were a wee bit out of balance. 

And for capturing the pure, distilled essence of an entire career built on truly Olympian clueless self-regard, nothing beats this single line by Brooks.

As a newspaper columnist, I’m paid for one skill above others: careful observation.

I have no words.


Burn The Lifeboats


CardinalJedi said...

When I read those columns, DG, I thought of you. You didn’t disappoint!

Mr XD said...

I have some words-MOAR BOOBS!!1!

Unknown said...

Careful observation of what, his own navel?

Jim from MN said...

These NYT OpEd writers are the ever-growing and increasingly humiliating strip of toilet paper on the bottom of the NYT's shoe. It doesn't seem to bother the NYT...OR...they are just choosing to ignore it.

Robt said...

Yes, many of us have noticed this phenomena .

Even the NYT own Op-Ed writer Paul Krugman has pointed out some of this from his own NYT colleague op ed writer Brooks.

Even holding up his actual piece and grading it. In front of the NYT's chief editor.

Sure, many will call it protected free speech. Brooks like Sarah Palin make sounds resembling speech, Brooks types words to be read that resemble comprehendible thoughts.
They just don't rise to the level of speech worth protecting or listening to.

dinthebeast said...

Off topic, but are we gonna see some Josh Hawley running away from stuff goodness?

-Doug in Sugar Pine

Dan Kleiner said...

stephens doesn't know how linear time works. it's fucking pathetic. the russian investigation was well underway before the FBI got hold of the steele dossier.