Dear New York Times

Brave conservative writers are punished by The New York Times, which gives them columns https://t.co/QPXrJPrWtU pic.twitter.com/akYcIO6Pgp

— Charles P. Pierce (@CharlesPPierce) April 20, 2018

Yesterday, I drove my family round-trip from our home in Springfield, Illinois to Augustana College, then on to Davenport, Iowa for lunch, and then home.

During the trip I...

...interacted with representative samples of Gen Z (kids in the back seat) and learned much about their mores, folkways, eating habits and musical/cultural tastes.  Through their stories and songs, I discovered what the expression "strictly dickly" means.

...interacted with members of an elite American educational institution (stepson and his roommate), and their surrounding multi-ethic community (There's a couple of Belgian restaurants, a German store, various churches, and the line was long at Hy-Vee with different kinds of people.)

...made detailed observations of the flora and fauna (couple of dead deer by the side of the road, also two raccoons and a possum) of the Midwest.

...made equally detailed observations of the effects of climate change (the mighty Mississippi has flooded Davenport for two block inland on), the glories of modern technology (we listened to a Game of Thrones podcast), the limits of modern technology (the nav kept trying to kill us by routing us through the flooded streets) and failing infrastructure (did I mention that the streets were flooded?)

...interacted with local Iowans at a popular luncheon restaurant and closely observed their political and sporting preference and cultural habits.  We laughed, and we cried, and we shared as we all drank deeply from the communal cup of watching this cable teevee station that plays adorable-pet and humans-fucking-up YouTube videos 24/7.

...closely observed the intersection of income inequality and our minimum-wage/minimum-service  economy (because of "problems in the kitchen" at the popular Davenport luncheon restaurant, it took over an hour for our meal to get to our table, and the fries were cold) two different, culturally-distinct, economically-diverse Midwest states (on the way back home and running out of steam. we stopped for coffee-to-go at a Dunkin Donuts somewhere outside of Decatur and they screwed up our order about as thoroughly as possible.)

In advance of the 2020 election, I propose that your paper hire me to pad my experience out into a four-part, 4,000 word essay on Midwestern mores, folkways, culture, politics, sports and dietary habits.  I envision is as positioned midway between Salena Zito's Trump Whisperer chronicles, and David Brooks' lightly "researched" observations made while peering out the window during the Acela Corridor commuter train's brief stop at Willoughby. 

Both folksy and cosmopolitan Folksopolitan!

Authentic, yet condescending.  Condescentic!

Unbearably pious yet vaguely smutty.  Pornograteful!

After that I would expect a recurring guest column in your paper, a book deal promoted by your paper, and arrangements made by your paper for regular appearances on PBS, NPR and cable news where I can promote my book.

So my question is, to whom to I submit the expense vouchers for my trip?

I await your prompt response,

driftglass

PS. We also skipped church to make the trip, so I would be willing to include a section on the relationship between late-stage capitalism and spiritual poverty and spice it up with quotes from Thoreau and Cato the Elder if this would make it easier to swallow for the gullible CEO's who (as we of the Midwest say) sop up David Brooks' drivel with a biscuit.

Behold, a Tip Jar!

Voice of Empire, Ctd

Two, correctional-facility-based questions bookended the Mouse Circus today: one asked and one unasked.

• Asked: Why the Hell weren't prisoners being held on Riker's Island evacuated?


• Unasked: Why the Hell isn't Richard Bruce Cheney and most of the rest of his Republican politico-criminal enterprise rotting away the rest of their lives in federal prison?

Interred beneath the vast, complicit media silence between the implications of these two questions is where you will find most everything that is wrong with the United States in this Year of Our Lord 2011.

Which is why, rather that daring to look Evil in the eye and asking "Why?", everyone instead settled into their comfortable media roles, giggled and whispering uncomfortably about how little regard cyborg and unindicted-war-criminal Cheney had for anyone that stood in his way, and how really, really unapologetic Vice President Sociopath is for anything.

As if this were some kind of surprise.

Also David Fucking Brooks was on teevee to basically re-read his Friday New York Times column verbatim.

Nice work if you can get it.

Our Mr. Brooks' reveals to a stunned nation that his Republican Party is now completely captive to a mob of bigots and yahoos who think Ned Beatty shore has a purdy mouth!

For those of you keeping score out there, these are the same people that Our Mr. Brooks has spend most of his career ignoring, preferring instead to measure out his life's teaspoons of bile onto Dirty Fucking Hippies whenever the opportunity presents itself do so in complete safety:

"In certain circles, it is not only important what opinion you hold, but how you hold it. It is important to be seen dancing with complexity, sliding among shades of gray. Any poor rube can come to a simple conclusion -- that President Saddam Hussein is a menace who must be disarmed--but the refined ratiocinators want to be seen luxuriating amid the difficulties, donning the jewels of nuance, even to the point of self-paralysis."

All of which only served to leave a depressed and distracted America with one more unanswered question:

Hurricane Irene: Good for John McCain...or great for John McCain?

You have now seen Sunday's Mouse Circus, except for the Fox News bit, which I understand was like bobbing for turds in a barrel of molten lead.

As an added bonus, J. Michael Straczynski explains in one minute and twenty seconds one quick way to begin to unfuck our

unholy clusterfuck of a media.

And With That

A "movement" was born...

From the NYT:

Crashing the Tea Party
By DAVID E. CAMPBELL and ROBERT D. PUTNAM

...
Our analysis casts doubt on the Tea Party’s “origin story.” Early on, Tea Partiers were often described as nonpartisan political neophytes. Actually, the Tea Party’s supporters today were highly partisan Republicans long before the Tea Party was born, and were more likely than others to have contacted government officials. In fact, past Republican affiliation is the single strongest predictor of Tea Party support today.

What’s more, contrary to some accounts, the Tea Party is not a creature of the Great Recession. Many Americans have suffered in the last four years, but they are no more likely than anyone else to support the Tea Party. And while the public image of the Tea Party focuses on a desire to shrink government, concern over big government is hardly the only or even the most important predictor of Tea Party support among voters.

So what do Tea Partiers have in common? They are overwhelmingly white, but even compared to other white Republicans, they had a low regard for immigrants and blacks long before Barack Obama was president, and they still do.

More important, they were disproportionately social conservatives in 2006 — opposing abortion, for example — and still are today. Next to being a Republican, the strongest predictor of being a Tea Party supporter today was a desire, back in 2006, to see religion play a prominent role in politics.
...

And once again, the only people stupid, corrupt, oblivious or just plain damnfool enough to buy yet another transparently obvious Republican Big Lie were the people who rule our elite Imperial not.




UPDATE: Nothing better crystallized the Serious-Person-Fart-Rebreathing-Bell-Jar mentality than this exchange between Devid Gergen (adviser to Presidents "On Both Sides" and former occupant of the Reasonable Republican Chair on "The News Hour" [currently being warmed by the Godawful David Fucking Brooks]) and Matt Taibbi (scruffy, Unserious Outsider who says "fuck sometimes", names names, and does the kind of actual, Honest-to-Royko reporting that David Gergen cannot even comprehend) from 2010:

Gergen: If it were not for the extra boost of enthusiasm the Tea Party provided, I imagine the Republicans would have won only 40 to 50 seats, instead of the 60-plus they gained. But the Tea Party also makes it harder in the future for Republicans to maintain a coherent party. Matt is right that they will have a large voice in the nomination process in 2012. But one cannot discount that someone could arise, as Reagan did in the past, who can bridge the differences within the party and keep people united.

Taibbi: To me, the main thing about the Tea Party is that they're just crazy. If somebody is able to bridge the gap with those voters, it seems to me they will have to be a little bit crazy too. That's part of the Tea Party's litmus test: "How far will you go?"

Gergen: I flatly reject the idea that Tea Partiers are crazy. They had some eccentric candidates, there's no question about that. But I think they represent a broad swath of the American electorate that elites dismiss to their peril.

Hart: I agree with David. When two out of five people who voted last night say they consider themselves supporters of the Tea Party, we make a huge mistake to suggest that they are some sort of small fringe group and do not represent anybody else.

Taibbi: I'm not saying that they're small or a fringe group.

Gergen: You just think they're all crazy.

Taibbi: I do.

Gergen: So you're arguing, Matt, that 40 percent of those who voted last night are crazy?

Taibbi: I interview these people. They're not basing their positions on the facts — they're completely uninterested in the facts. They're voting completely on what they see and hear on Fox News and afternoon talk radio, and that's enough for them.

Gergen: The great unwashed are uneducated, so therefore their views are really beneath serious conversation?

Taibbi: I'm not saying they're beneath serious conversation. I'm saying that these people vote without acting on the evidence.

Gergen: I find it stunning that the conversation has taken this turn. I disagree with the Tea Party on a number of issues, but it misreads who they are to dismiss them as some kind of uneducated know-nothings who have somehow seized power in the American electorate. It is elitist to its core. We would all be better off if we spent more time listening to each other rather than simply writing them off.

Two years later, Taibbi and the Dirty Fucking Hippies are once again proven right and the Very Serious Gergenites are once again proven to be dead wrong.

Any bets that Gergen will get his Sage Insider ticket lifted over this?

Over anything?

Ever?

Of course not.

Because long ago at the heart of the American Empire, "properly vetted and researched" stopped meaning much beyond that which has been passed to you under the Men's Room stall partition at Bistor Bis on "Matt Drudge" letterhead.

At the heart of our falling Empire, if you side with the Villagers, any amount of incompetence, contempt for the facts and just jaw-dropping fuckuppery will be instantly forgiven and forgotten: side against them, and unless you are very lucky and very good, the tiniest slip -- even no slip at all -- means your career will killed as as dead as Dillinger.

Dearth of a Salesman

Crazy old man vows to fight on!

The further Adventures of Baron Grifthausen.

File under: Fleas leaving a sinking rat.

From the AP:

Gingrich campaign fundraisers quit

By PHILIP ELLIOTT, Associated Press

ATLANTA (AP) — Newt Gingrich's top two fundraising advisers resigned on Tuesday, and officials said the Republican candidate's hobbling presidential campaign carried more than $1 million in debt.

The departures of fundraising director Jody Thomas and fundraising consultant Mary Heitman were the latest blow for the former House speaker who watched 16 top advisers abandon his campaign en masse earlier this month, partly because of what people familiar with the campaign spending described as a dire financial situation.
These people, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to discuss the campaign inner workings, said the former Georgia lawmaker racked up massive travel bills but money had only trickled in since he got into the race earlier this spring.

These officials said that he is at least $1 million in debt. The current fundraising quarter ends June 30, and Gingrich will have to disclose his campaign finances by July 15. He is personally wealthy and could fund his campaign out of his own pocket, at least in the short term, to keep his campaign afloat.

Gingrich has insisted that he will not abandon his troubled bid and will continue fighting for the Republican nomination for president "no matter what it takes." He's revamping his campaign, given the series of departures.

"Newt 2012 continues its reorganization and alignment as a grassroots driven, substantive, solutions-oriented campaign," a spokesman, R.C. Hammond, told The Associated Press, adding that the campaign is "as committed as ever."
...

He has refused to answer questions about his rocky rollout, his vacation to the Mediterranean or the exodus of his top staff from his headquarters near Atlanta and from the early nominating states.

"I will endure the challenges. I will carry the message of American renewal to every part of this great land," Gingrich told a crowded ballroom at a Beverly Hills hotel recently. "And with the help of every American who wants to change Washington, we will prevail."

Where have I heard this hearty tone before?

Oh yeah.

Jefferson Davis, April 4, 1865.

To the People of the Confederate States of America.

...
We have now entered upon a new phase of a struggle the memory of which is to endure for all ages and to shed an increasing luster upon our country.

Relieved from the necessity of guarding cities and particular points, important but not vital to our defense, with an army free to move from point to point and strike in detail the detachments and garrisons of the enemy, operating on the interior of our own country, where supplies are more accessible, and where the foe will be far removed from his own base and cut off from all succor in case of reverse, nothing is now needed to render our triumph certain but the exhibition of our own unquenchable resolve. Let us but will it, and we are free; and who, in the light of the past, dare doubt your purpose in the future?

But don't worry about Newt; as long as David Gregory has a mouth, the Smartest Baby in the Sandbox will always have a warm place to park his sphincter and hawk his drivel.

Fundamentally.

Basically.

Radically.

Open Thread

Open Thread