Wednesday, June 12, 2024

Brain Bug is Afraid

As an unreconstructed neocon, Bret "Bug" Stephens remains extraordinary extravagant about who he thinks Joe Biden should be bombing and how hard.  Listening to him whine about how cautious Biden is being about not lobbing lit road flares around in a region that is already saturated with gasoline and oily rags, one cannot help but conclude that the idea of "From the River to the Sea" is an eastward-pointing slogan for Bret Bug.  That he'd be more than happy to restart the Bush-era delusion of region-wide regime decapitation, starting with Biden glassing everything from the Jordan River east to the Caspian Sea, then sending in the Marines to something something Jeffersonian democracy and a flat tax.  

Only by embracing this Cheneyesque vision of American hard military power, violently projected everywhere from Day One, could Biden have won the favor of Bret Bug.  Which, you would think, after the historic, humiliating debacle that became of the Great Iraqi Liberation Thing Bug and his fellow neocons were so enthusiastic about, clowns like Bug would have second thoughts about.  

But you would be wrong. 

Clowns like Bug never learn. That's part of their Conservatives ethos: never, ever admit you're wrong about anything.  Just keep doubling down on your disastrous ideas until a coven of Underwear Gnomes pass a miracle and everything turns around and you can tell history to fuck off because, secretly, you've were right all along!

The trick to understanding goofs like Bug is that they do not live in the here-and-now.  Instead, thanks to the princely salary that the House of Sulzberger provides him, Bug can afford to live far over the ever -receding horizon of the future, in an imaginary happy tomorrow place where he has already been proven right and he can tell all us smarty-pants Liberals to suck it.

But until then, according to Bug, the very least Biden can do to make it up to Bug for failing him so badly is to immediately announce he is stepping aside, thus throwing the Democratic party into chaos six months before the election and virtually guaranteeing a Trump win in November.

His op-ed is entitled "The Most Courageous Thing That Joe Biden Can Do", and by now I think we can all agree where anatomically Mr. Bret 'Bug' Stephens of The New York Times can stick his advice and opinions with a ramrod.

The first sentence is the usual Obligatory Conserative Reagan Knob-Slobbering -- 

In 1977, Ronald Reagan shared his thoughts on the Cold War with his aide Richard Allen...

-- about which even the Lawrence Berkeley National Lab electron microscope could not detect how little of a damn I give.

And then, right at the end, comes this bag of burning shit dropped on the White House lawn.  The doorbell is rung, and Bug scampers away into the night.  

It all leaves the president with one option that can be a win for America and, ultimately, his place in history. He can still choose not to run, to cede the field to a Democrat who can win — paging Josh Shapiro or Gretchen Whitmer — and do the hard and brave things it will take to secure security and peace for the free world.

 So what motivates a mook like Bug to not just write such patently ludicrous trash, but to publish it in The New York Times?

I would speculate that it's fear.

Fear of what, you may ask?

Fear that a Biden victory in November would mean that Bug's dream of an America that bombs the hell out of anyone who even looks at us cross-eyed would have to be shelved for another four years.  Because, I would speculate, Bug would rather live under a lawless madman who will garrotte our democracy to death on live television but will also blow a lot of shit up that Bug wants to seen blown up...

...than under a judicious Democrat who is trying very hard not to start WWIII and who has also undoubtedly driven Bug mad by managing to pass more landmark progressive legislation, and against greater odds, than any Democrat since LBJ.  

Looks to me that, not-so-secretly, Bug is afraid that Biden might win.  

And I, for one. take comfort in that.

I Am The Liberal Media

1 comment:

driftglass said...

This is for commenter "Anonymous". I'm pretty sure your comment was made in error since it referenced something on your own "C://" drive, which is why I haven't published it.