The ComaCons (tm)

From Mona Charen's waxwork collection of superannuated scolds and Anna Applebaum both warning that the real Trump victory nightmare scenario might be the "crazy Left" getting even crazier...

...to David Fucking Brooks finally running out of political polyjuice potion and reverting completely to his most egregiously Both Siderist scoldy self...

...to Andrew Sullivan reimagining the 2016 election as some kind of Hillary Clinton Woke Left death march --

Biden ran a campaign, in stark contrast to Clinton’s, focused not on rallying the base around identity grievances, but on persuading the other side with argument and engagement.

-- the overriding concern of America's extraordinarily privileged, white Comatose Conservatives, or ComaCons, is that the Democratic Party not move one inch to the "Left".

Of course, as the mouthpieces for an ideologically bankrupt movement, the ComaCons tend to be elusive when it comes to defining exactly they mean by the "Left", crazy or otherwise.

For example, if pushed, hard, they will grudgingly acknowledge that climate change is real and a genuine threat...but they have no idea what should be done about it beyond whining about AOC.

And, sure, people should probably have access to decent health care that they can afford...which the ComaCons somehow seem to forget was considered a dirty Commie heresy by many of these same people just a few years ago.

In fact, for a group who are obsessed with an imaginary "cancel culture" and speech codes on a handful of elite college campuses, instead of a clear idea of what it is about Liberal policies that freak them out so badly, the ComaCons complaints amount to little more than a long and ponderous list of things that people should just not talk about.

They definitely don't want you talking about race.

Or gender.

Or the history of the United States.

Or the history of the Republican Party.

Or, really, the Past prior to 2016 in any way.  Because that apparently smacks of "tribalism" which every ComaCon will tell you is very very bad for exactly the same reason that a serial killer will insist that digging around in their basement is very very bad.

Because that's where the evidence of their crimes are buried.

Or, as Mike Gillis wraps up his parody of leaving the Republican Party in The New Yorker (h/t Walt Auvil)...

In closing, today I depart from the party I once loved so much with great anxiety for the future of our country but also an abiding faith in the ability of our citizens to rise above their petty disagreements and give me a multimillion-dollar contract at a cable news network. We, as a nation, have blindly forgiven far worse than what I’ve done, and I sincerely believe we can do it again. All that it takes is everyone suffering severe head trauma and forgetting the past forty years of my actions and beliefs. Then, and only then, can we transcend the divisiveness of the current moment and move on to a glorious new world in which I can afford a nice renovation of my kitchen, with one of those refrigerators that’s built right into the wooden cabinetry.

No Half Measures