On your Mouse Circus today...
The Neoconservative Uri Geller comes to “Face the Nation”
to bend reality with the power of his pornstache.
John Cole puts the boot in here:
The Mustache of Understanding:
I’ve been trying to understand the Tea Party Movement. Sounds like a lot of angry people who want to get the government out of their lives and cut both taxes and the deficit. Nothing wrong with that — although one does wonder where they were in the Bush years. Never mind. I’m sure like all such protest movements the Tea Partiers will get their 10 to 20 percent of the vote. But should the Tea Partiers actually aspire to break out of that range, attract lots of young people and become something more than just entertainment for Fox News, I have a suggestion:
Become the Green Tea Party.
I’d be happy to design the T-shirt logo and write the manifesto. The logo is easy. It would show young Americans throwing barrels of oil imported from Venezuela and Saudi Arabia into Boston Harbor.
The manifesto is easy, too: “We, the Green Tea Party, believe that the most effective way to advance America’s national security and economic vitality would be to impose a $10 “Patriot Fee” on every barrel of imported oil, with all proceeds going to pay down our national debt.”
They weren’t around protesting during the Bush years BECAUSE THE TEA PARTY IS REPUBLICANS. They don’t care about the deficit. They care that a Democrat (and a black “Muslim,” to boot), is in the White House. They don’t care about fiscal restraint, they care that a Democrat is in the White House.
Andy "Ronstalgia" Sullivan dances onto the hearts of ”The Chris Matthews Show”
panel by declaring that he is tired of people making excuses for Right Wing nutjobs, and letting them off the hook because they’re “entertainers”. Who is pushing back against this within the GOP? Nobody. Look, Fox News is the Republican Party.
And so forth.
I must say I am always just fracking delighted to see a Conservative racking up both substantial personal income and edgy insightfulness teevee street cred by boldly catching up to where Liberals were 20 years ago.
Chris Matthews, (bless his heart) sticks the knife in.
Kelly O'Donnell: I think people have a different standard for political entertainment – people who get rich being outrageous -- and political office holders.
Matthews: What about Sarah Palin?
O'Donnell: Uh…uh….she’s moving towards the entertainment side.
The Pig People have been taught by years of repetition and electoral success that slathering their degenerate ideology in scripture, or flags, or funny entertainer hats was some clever magic trick that would forever fool the Hated Liberals. A Golden Ticket that gave them unlimited and unassailable license to vomit up one paranoid, bigoted or just-plain-bugfuck-insane farrago of lies after another.
And as long as it won them elections and made scum like Rush Limbaugh immensely rich, the Villagers -- who cravenly cater only money and power -- were willing to go along with the lies, which is why the Pig People got it into their tiny, inbred skulls that being raving, delusional thugs squatting in moral squalor and blaming their problems on Imaginary Hippies was a Valid Lifestyle Choice.
Because for most of my adult life, there has been no one on the Right or in the Center who was willing to drag these scum out into the light just keep kicking them over and over and over again until they stopped behaving like the spoiled, whiny imbeciles...or crawled back into their double-wides and left us civilized people the Hell alone.
For virtually all of that time -- as the Right's berserk recklessness escalated through the crimes of Reagan, the racism of Atwater, the mutilation of Christianity by Falwell, the Orwellian codification of Hate by Gingrich, the War on Clinton, the crimes of DeLay, and the serial treasonage of the Cheney Administration -- it was only the Left who were sounding the alarm about the Great Wingnut Fucksturm that was coming.
The Great Wingnut Fucksturm that has now arrived.
And the fact that the Left has now been proven unambiguously correct about the vicious fraud that Conservatism has always been -- and that we are no longer willing to be polite about it, or let them hide behind flags and bibles and the title of "entertainer" -- is why the Riders of that Fucksturm hate the Left more than ever, and with a rabid, unhinged fury that is at long last really starting the scare the crap out of the ringmasters of the Mouse Circus.
Lastly, the Monsters were Due
on Fluffy Gregory Street
Everyone was really, really sad that John McSame has become the absolute whore that the Left always knew him to be.
Bobo Brooks is now dimly aware that the Right has become every bit the freakshow that the Left has been warning about for a generation, but still somehow manages to leave the impression that he has no idea where all these orcs are coming from, and that maybe if the Left would just compromise a little more.
Bobo: Seeing as how I've never seen a rich man's dick that didn't make my mouth water, I’d like to defend Goldman Sachs. Everyone thought the housing market would go up forever. Goldman Sachs are scuzzballs, but they were smart to bet against it.
Sachs was rigging up insanely complicated black boxes full of nitro, rat shit, crack, 12-page formulas on the theoretical topography of n-dimensional financial hyperspace, eye of Newt, toe of frog and the strongest brand of industrial strength hooker perfume money can buy.
Then paid the rating agencies to label them “Baby Food”.
Then they paid off the cops to look the other way.
Then they sold them to normal humans and institutional investors.
Then made side-bets that their black boxes would explode.
Then they made a fortune when their black boxes went “Boom” and took down the global economy controlled-demolition-style.
The are, in other words, Conservatism Incarnate, so you can see why they make Little Bobo stand up and salute.
David Gregory: I will now sycophantically read aloud from David Brooks’ hideously dishonest “big gummint vs. small gummint” column and ask David Brooks to comment on it.
Brooks: This guy is awesome.
Michele Norris: This could be an opportunity for Republicans.
Because it always is.
Erin Burnett: People are buying stuff! We’re saved!
Evan Thomas: The long term numbers suck. We’re doomed.
Michele Norris: And the Boomers are fucking locusts.
Gregory: Is there a more Centrist vs. Big Gummint argument?
So...Centrism if the new Republicanism, Big Gummint is still Evil Liberalism...and somewhere in between those two...something...is supposed to happen?
Maybe Fluffy should pick two other semantically-meaningless and unrelated words to arbitrarily compare in order to avoid discussion the fact that the Right is the Problem. Perhaps "penguin" and "bar graph"?
Or "muppet" and "quanta"?
Brooks: Obama has lost Independents! People are mad about stuff, although I’d rather not talk about “Why” because then I’d be forced to mention my Party’s bloody fingerprints all over every problem. But the disgust is amazing!
Thomas: Obama is drifting. In a time when everybody is loud and dramatic, no one is paying attention.
Gregory: We’ll be back next week in high definition.
And low fact.
Elsewhere, George Will was a tool and Mitch McConnell was a lying douchbag.
1. Failure in or neglect of duty or obligation; dereliction; default: delinquency in payment of dues.
2. Wrongful, illegal, or antisocial behavior.
3. Something, as a debt, that is past due or otherwise delinquent.