Jeff Zucker, Giant Pussy.

Multibillion-dollar global behemoth whines that tiny basic-cable, joke-telling-guy “is picking on me!”

Vows to run home; tell mommy.

Since that golden day 52 years ago when Margaret Dumont and Gale Gordon got drunk and ran over six clowns with a seltzer truck, comedians have wondered: “Will such a happy collision of comic opportunity ever come again?"

Well, judge for yourself.

From Yahoo News:

NBC boss: Jon Stewart's criticism absurd, unfair
By Paul Thomasch

NEW YORK (Reuters) – NBC Universal Chief Executive Jeff Zucker fired back at comedian Jon Stewart on Wednesday, saying it was "unfair" and "absurd" for the funnyman to criticize CNBC and question its coverage of financial news.

"Everybody wants to find a scapegoat. That's human nature," Zucker said during a keynote address at a media industry conference. "But to suggest that the business media or CNBC was responsible for what is going on now is absurd."

"Just because someone who mocks authority says something doesn't make it so," Zucker said, describing the comedian's comments as "completely out of line."

Zucker's comments are the latest salvo in a war of words with Stewart, who hosts the mock news program "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart" on the Comedy Central cable television network owned by Viacom Inc.

Stewart has blasted CNBC's reporting of the financial market meltdown, saying the channel was too cozy with corporate chiefs and key government officials.

The comedian has lobbed particularly harsh criticism at CNBC commentator Jim Cramer, and last week invited him for an appearance on the comedy show, where he hammered the guest for his coverage of Wall Street.
…

Because everyone knows nothing shuts down a whip-smart, knives-out comic faster and puts him in his place more terminally than a rich, corporate douchebag wagging a jewel-encrusted finger in his face and bleating about how unfaaaaair he’s being.

OK, Mr. Zucker, since you appear to be almost preternaturally unable to grasp what is happening right in front of you, let me explain.

When people like you, Mr. Zucker, chose to put on a freak show of CEO-handjobbing puffery and WWF rants instead genuine financial news because people like loud, shiny things...when you chose to slingshot Broderism-hind-teat-hustlebuck-runtlings like David Gregory into positions of extraordinary media prominence and influence instead of real reporters...you helped create a massive, suffocating vacuum where “journalism” used to be.

And the thinking public will not abide such a vacuum.

You, teevee giant Jeff Zucker, are the one who helped created a media so overtly bent, profit-obsessed and nakedly corrupt that, in the end, millions and millions of us no longer trust anything it tells us. It has been too horribly wrong too often. It has compromised with monsters and appeased destroyers too often. It has excused its own gluttony and cowardice and mind-numbing incompetence with self-serving, self-pitying twaddle about “balance” and “objectivity” too often. It has willingly sold us out to the rich and powerful far, far too often.

You, Mr. Zucker, are the one who abdicated his responsibilities and helped make a world where just about the only one we even halfway believe won't bullshit us along until he can knife us in the back is a joke writer from New Jersey.

You dropped the scepter, Mr. Zucker: all Stewart did was pick it up and use it to smack around a few of your more obnoxious, over-paid dancing bears.

So stand up and take a fucking bow.