Saturday, January 24, 2009

Sexual Davenport


I am hosting the best relatives in America this weekend, so keeping it short today.

And so a joke, courtesy of my cool, hippy mom.

A woman walks into a furniture store…

Salesman: Can I help you ma’am?

Woman: Yes, well I don’t know if you carry them, but I’m looking for a sexual davenport.

Pause.

Salesman: A what?

Woman: A sexual davenport.

Salesman: You must mean a sectional davenport.

Woman: No, I’m looking for a sexual davenport.

Longer pause

Salesman: Ma’am, I’ve been selling furniture for thirty years and I have never heard of anything called a “sexual davenport”.

Woman: Well I don’t care what you call it, but what I want is an occasional piece in my living room.


Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, and don’t forget to tip your wait staff generously.

8 comments:

Fran / Blue Gal said...

And watch for crumbs in the cushions, especially on the certified pre-owned models. ;)

Woody (Tokin Librul/Rogue Scholar/ Helluvafella!) said...

RIP, Betty Page.

Phil said...

Good one.

Yer mom sounds pretty cool dude.

Anonymous said...

Is my unconcious showing? I just read "I don't try to describe the FURNITURE: I try to prevent it"
hahahaha

Blader said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yl3UMO-TkE

jurassicpork said...

When you get back, drifty, here's something to ease you back into the fold-

Assclowns of the Year #75: Diamond Jubilee/Inauguration Edition is up. The mother of all Assclowns edition, this is a year-long retrospective of the top 50 Assclowns of 2008. Persecuted for posterity:

George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, John McCain, Sarah Palin, William Kristol, Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin, Israel including some shocking surprising entries. And you won’t believe who #1 is (Now don’t go scrolling straight down to the bottom, read the whole list. You’ll be glad you did.)

Now remember what Ben Franklin said about fish & relatives.

lostnacfgop said...

Considering that "Mama LOST" used to slap us silly for using the word "Poopoo" in the mid/late 1960's, I don't think I'd process it well if she told us that joke nowadays.

Then again, some the e-mails she forwards are . . . interesting to say the least.

Congrats on the award, Drift-1. You've earned it and then some.

darkblack said...

This sort of blue comedy is what's wrong with blogs today - Bring back the good old days of Usenet and Compuserve, by cracky.

;>)