To be sung to the tune of "Hey, Bulldog" and with apologies to Messers Lennon and McCartney.
Lapdog,
Better get out of the rain
Poop-log,
Tryin’ to get back in the game
Your Party’s Felonies are
measured out in miles
What makes you think you're
something special when you smile
Child-man
Jesus’ Special Friend
Jack (the) Knife
Thief with sweatin' hands
Your fed-time sentence will be
measured out in years
You don't know what it's like
to listen to your fears
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
If you're lonely, you can talk to me**
Big man
(yeah) walking in the park
The New Abscam
Singin’ like a Lark
Some years in solitary
are waiting now for you
You think you know me,
but you haven't got a clue
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
If you're lonely, you can talk to me
Hey –ey
Rowww,rrrowow
Hey, Lapdog (Hey Lapdog)
Woof
Hey, Lapdog
Hey, Lapdog
Hey, Lapdog
**(Mary K. Butler, the prosecutor in the Abramoff case.)
7 comments:
I've always thought that "Hey Bulldog" was perhaps the most underrated Beatles song. It rocks out as hard as anything they'd ever done, and its lyrics are right up there (in terms of poetic incomprehensibility) with "Strawberry Fields", "I am the Walrus", "Across the Universe" or "Come Together". In other words, Lennon's meds were well balanced that day.
Anyways, props to you for using it as the basis for your simple desultory phillipic.
LOL! That was fabulous, dude! Thanks for the laugh!
Whenever I think you can't get any better...you do. Thanks for the many laughs.
Brilliance! The visual double hit of Abramoff (with the salad-toss pucker) floored me. And the words...the goddamned words...man!
You scare me. You inspire me.
Best,
LowerManhattanite
/'umble bow/
Excellent.
-- mac
worth a good laugh or thousand.
congrats!
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