Wednesday, June 29, 2016

The Tribe That Rubs Shit In Their Hair

First, a quick refresher on your favorite cult and mine, the Tribe That Rubs Shit In Their Hair:
Longtime readers know that "The Tribe That Rubs Shit In Their Hair" is my shorthand for inbred Conservative meatsticks who have wallowed in wingnut Hate Radio racist dung and Fox News Liberal Conspiracy claptrap for so long that is has become the quotidian argot of their wretched lives.  It is their tavern-talk -- their worst, paranoid delusions, externalized, validated, tarted up as The Unvarnished Truth and then regurgitated back to them by ghouls and treason-mongers like Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly... which are, in turn, passed around again like so many fish stories, getting bigger and wilder and truthier with each iteration.    It is the shit they eagerly rub in their hair -- the shit which, year after year, they sculpt into ever more elaborate pompadours because everyone else in their dingy, lightless corner of Universe is doing it and they lost their sense of smell 40 years ago.

They preen over each other. They are happy in each other's company. They praise each other on the little, individual touches with which they have customized their Shitheap Toupees -- an extra layer of Benghaaaazi, perhaps, appliqued over something something the New Black Panther Party because ACORN!.

And all is right with the world...right up until they leave the cocoon of their Wingnut Pig Sty and step into the normal world, where they are Shocked!Shocked! that ordinary people flee from them in horror.
So why do they say and do shit like this, loud and proud and in public?


Because among the Pig People, this is the height of wit.  To their tiny, debased brains, this is Oscar Wilde-level drollery.  This is their Algonquin Fucking Round Table.


Kaye said...

Ugh, truly scary these are people who have kids and vote 😬

Rob said...

But people aren't fleeing from us in horror any more. They are asking for a pomade of shit from us now.

Unknown said...

Remember when a bunch of pasty old white people showed up to the 2004 RNC convention with little purple heart tattoos and flip flops to mock the Vietnam vet who has more courage in his pinkie toe than all of them put together? They thought that was hiLARious.

Yeah, now they're considerably WORSE than that. Stupefying.

Unknown said...

Why, because fuck you that's why. Which is the extent of their intellect

Unknown said...

Why, because fuck you that's why. Which is the extent of their intellect

RUKidding said...

Personal story. About the time you published this, I was treated to an exhibition of someone rubbing shit in their hair and demanding that those of us in the peanut gallery bow before the fabulousness of it.

Too difficult to 'splain what happened, other than, a friend of mine sends out silly emails to a group of people. One recipient let loose with a totally unnecessary and very prejudiced comment about what was a rather innocuous article about a 9/11 monument in Israel.

A couple of my former college roomies wrote what I felt were respectful and very thoughtful (and short) emails in response, bascially asking for more respect, please.

I don't know the shit-in-the-hair tribalist, but my conjecture is that he spent a couple of days furiously "researching" his rightwing talking points on Breitbart or similar. He came back with a list of nasty shouty rightwing "zingers," and then preened before us - shitty hair stinking up the room - and "challenged" us to take him on some more. Of course, nothing he vomited out made much sense, nor did it refute the respectful points that my friends made.

My first thought? Drifty has advised us that there is no point in attempting to "reason with" with or talk to such loons. They are beyond redemption. I backed away slowly; came here; read this. Perfect synergy.

Yes, indeed, the pig people do enjoy rubbing shit in their hair and then demand that we pay fealty to them for how fabulous their poopies look and smell. Caveat emptor.

HarpoSnarx said...

And if anyone, anywhere builds that high head pile of shit, it's the detestable, excretable Howie "I just spoke with Rupert" Carr, the mini-Gawd of Massholes and drivetime New Hampshits forced to seek employment in "Taxachusetts."