Stupid Watergate

So far, Stupid Watergate is checking every box.  Crimes, cash and coverups.  

In both scandals, a hugely incriminating gap in a critical tape has been found that just happens to be  right where the smoking gun would have been.

In both scandals, we find shoe leather hustle by honest journalists on a story that none of the elite members of the legacy media wanted to touch.  Honest reporting that is not only moving the story forward, but also shaming the "Let's move on to something else" legacy media into getting off their fat asses and start asking questions. of their own.   

From Wired magazine:

The FBI's Jeffrey Epstein Prison Video Had Nearly 3 Minutes Cut Out

Metadata from the “raw” Epstein prison video shows approximately 2 minutes and 53 seconds were removed from one of two stitched-together clips. The cut starts right at the “missing minute.”

In both scandals, there are ominous and obviously panicked firings of key players who threaten to bring the scandal inside the White House.  

From emptywheel:

Pam Bondi Fired the Avenger of Sex Trafficking Victims on Donald Trump’s Personal Authority

I’ve often said that, this time, Donald Trump has chosen poorly of which people to make political martyrs.

Less than eight hours after proclaiming that the Jeffrey Epstein scandal was just some “new SCAM” perpetrated by Democrats, about four days after he first attempted to float the wildly illogical claim that the Epstein “Files [were] written by Obama, Crooked Hillary, Comey, Brennan, and the Losers and Criminals of the Biden Administration,” DOJ fired Jim Comey’s daughter, Maurene.

According to the NYT, the letter terminating Ms. Comey cited Article II authority.

Ms. Comey was informed of her firing in a letter that cited Article II of the Constitution, which describes the powers of the president, according to two of the people.

From 1973, the Saturday Night Massacre:

The obvious difference this time is that Nixon's Attorney General, Eliot Richardson, was fired because he took a principled stand against what Nixon was trying to do, whereas Trump's Attorney General is an unprincipled whore who would do any monstrous thing Trump told her to do.

On the other hand, Nixon's previous Attorney General, John Mitchell, was corrupt as fuck and was convicted of several Watergate-related crimes.  

Like OG Watergate, Stupid Watergate implicates members of Trump's cabinet and his inner circle of creepy, fascist "advisors".

And, like OG Watergate, the central character in Stupid Watergate is a bitter, paranoid, lying crook who is obviously guilty as hell, who is unraveling by the day, who is shedding supporters like a pug sheds fur, who is lashing out in all directions, and who oscillates wildly between pleading and demanding that everyone shut the fuck up and move on.  

This may be where Stupid Watergate veers off the OG Watergate track, but if not, then expect Trump to offer to reveal the TRUTH about the Epstein files, "warts and all", but only via an "investigation" he personally controls, which will produce a PERFECT "report" that he will personally edit.  Should this be the case, expect "The Final Word On The Obama Biden Crooked Hillary Epstein Hoax SCAM" to be bound in cheap, fake leather and offered on Trump's merch site alongside the Trump Bible and Trump Shitcoins and all the rest of the landfill detritus of this Monster from the Republican Id.

If you can think of any other parallels between OG Watergate and Stupid Watergate, leave them in the comments.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Addenda:  As Lindsay Beyerstein points out, what makes Stupid Watergate extra potent is the nature of the scandal at the heart of it:

 We are living through a slow-burn satanic panic where a large percentage of evangelicals believe that child traffickers run the United States of America.

“This is a very specific complaint that is deeply felt and very dark that is in MAGA. If you spend much time in MAGA circles you will encounter a lot of people it’s not just that they think the elites are out to get them. They think the elites are running a global pedophile ring, that America is run by pedophiles. Now, the extreme version of that is the QAnon but the Epstein controversy is part and parcel of this," [David] French explains.

The whole reason these people supported Donald Trump in the first place was because he promised to liberate America from the Satanic pedophiles and if he won't do that, he's not the Chosen One after all. 

No Half Measures