"Have You Already Unwrapped the Priceless Gift of Virginity and Given It Away?"

Back in the 1990s (and before that among some member of my extended circle of friends, acquaintances and well-wishers) the concept of Born Again Virginity sprang into being (virgin birth!) and was suddenly all over the place.  In fact, the title of this post is taken directly from a surgical option that was on offer at the Pregnancy Resource Center of Northeast Ohio back in 2008.  For a price, the PRCNO would "rewrap" that gift, put it back on the shelf where you could keep it until you were ready to re-gift it to your future husband on your wedding night.  An excellent summary of this creepy ritual can be found at the venerable Jezebel website here.

The specific case that made it into the news at NBC and thence on to Jezebel's radar was that of:

Victoria Watts is 23, a single mother of two and a "renewed virgin." She had sex for the first time when she was 16, but always felt guilty about bumpin' uglies outside of marriage. She says the first time you have sex with a husband is "one of the greatest fulfillments" in a woman's life. "My [future] husband deserves a whole person." Jesus Christ. Literally! Watts is the granddaughter of a pastor and the daughter of an assistant pastor. (So it's through prayer that she's a virgin again.)

I have nothing against Ms. Watts.  I've never met and I hope, if it is her wish, that she is happily married to the love of her life and doing great.  Instead what caught my eye was the fact that, however much she prayed, she still had two children from her pre-born again days.  Because whatever we might wish the past to have been, the actual past was real, it happened as it happened, and it carries its own blessings and consequences.  

I mention all of this by way of easing you into what I think is another episode of my long-running series,  "Matthew Dowd is a Fundamentally Ridiculous Person".

Matthew Dowd, as you may or may not know, was a Republican campaign operative for many years and the architect of George W. Bush's successful 2004 re-election campaign.  Then there was a falling out, and Mr. Dowd moved on to becoming ABC News' chief political analyst where he spent the entire 2015/16 campaign season saying remarkably dumb and profoundly wrong things on Twitter.  

Mr. Dowd and I clashed repeatedly over the remarkably dumb and profoundly wrong things he was saying on Twitter until eventually he blocked me because, frankly, every time we bandied words he came away looking like an idiot who didn't know shit-all about the Republican Party or the Democratic Party.  Like someone who really had no business collecting a paycheck as ABC News' chief political analyst.  And since I was a person of no importance, there was no downside to him blocking me.  

Well recently and very abruptly Mr. Dowd "parted company" with ABC News for reasons that no one wishes to go on the record about.   Mr. Dowd is now clearly shopping for another teevee media gig, which is why you may have seen him suddenly popping up on MSNBC.

Which made me  wonder whether or not anyone, anywhere along his new path was ever going to ask him to reconcile his clear and unambiguous opinion as ABC News' chief political analyst just a few years ago -- 

both status quo parties are broken.Saying 1 is worse thanother isn't helpful

— Matthew Dowd (@matthewjdowd) August 21, 2016

-- an opinion he aggressively dined out on for years...

...with his opinion now that:

Some important data from latest @QuinnipiacPoll
Voters sense of right/wrong direction of two parties:
Dems 46% 46% net 0
GOP 23% 64% net -41

So today in America it isn’t that two parties who are totally out of kilter with the moment, it is the GOP way off in wrong direction.

— Matthew Dowd (@matthewjdowd) February 8, 2021

Because here's the thing.  It's not like the mainstream press was young and foolish when one day, deep in the throes of puppy love, they decided to discretely try a little Both Siderism.  Just once or twice, you understand!,  And just the tip, with the lights out and missionary only, with every intention of pulling out before anything bad could happen.  And then they immediately regretted it and would now very much appreciate it if everyone would agree to pretend the whole thing never happened.

Oh my goodness no.

Instead, virtually the entire mainstream media spent the entire 2015/16 campaign season (and quite a long time afterward) getting their false equivalence freak enthusiastically on at the loudest, sloppiest, bare-backinest, ball-slappyiest, hard-dickingest hardcore Both Siderist Bacchanalia you've ever seen.  An orgy at which ABC News' chief political analyst Matthew Dowd was one of the Masters of Revels.

And however much Mr. Dowd has prayed over it, there is still a huge archive of his remarkably dumb and profoundly wrong political opinions out there on the interwebs from his pre-born again days for anyone to see.  And whatever he might wish the past to have been, Mr. Dowd's actual past was real, it happened as it happened, and it really should carry its own blessings and consequences. 

But will it?  Will anyone, anywhere ask a guy applying for the job of sitting in front of a camera and blabbing his political opinions to explain why he should have that job when he his record of political opinion-having has been so manifestly terrible?

I suspect not.  

After all, Mr. Dowd remains a member in good standing in the Beltway Insider Club (formerly known as the Both Siderist Bacchanalia Society) which exists solely to shield its members from the consequences of their actions. So expect to see Mr. Dowd coming soon to a cable teevee network near you, where he will speak firmly and piously and 100% in-line with whichever way the prevailing corporate political winds happen to be blowing.

No Half Measures