It's Not That There Aren't Plenty of New Horrors To Write About

It's that the same old horrors keep climbing out of their graves and shambling across the country over and over again.  

For example, not so very long ago I was fiddling with a post I never finished with the working title of "What's America's Hardest Hit Industry?  The Answer May Surprise You!"

And it wasn't about restaurants, or clothing retailers, or skate parks or mimes.

It was about American media's favorite featherbedding racket: Magic Ruralism.

Noun: a literary or artistic genre in which realistic narrative and naturalistic technique are combined with surreal elements of political fantasy

Of course you won't find Magic Ruralism writer listed on the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, Industries at a Glance page, but it should be. Because there was a time in this country, my friend. Oh yes, there was a time...

A glorious time when we poor, unlettered residents of Middle America could not step off the curb without risking being run down by a fleet of New York Times Zeitgeist Action Vans whizzing hither and thither in search of the next big Wingnut at the Diner story.  A time when you couldn't swing a dead hodag 'round here without hitting a Washington Post reporter who had been dispatched like Marlow in Heart of Darkness to brave the Inner Continent and reach the economically anxious tribe who had somehow anointed a racist Day-Glo lunatic as their Dear Leader.

Of course, as a disreputable Liberal living in Trump country, this mighty engine of economic prosperity passed me and my family right by.  We languished on the porch for days, whittling and playing the jug and waiting for just one of the phalanx of reporters that roamed our streets to stop by and ask us what we thought of the reign of President Stupid.  But none ever did.  I even decked myself out in my best/worst Carhartts to lure them into an interview, but there were no takers. 

I think we're on a list somewhere.

Anyhow (I thought) all that's over now, right?

Area hotels would no longer inflate their prices to more efficiently mine the pockets of the waves of Beltway media scribes descending on our little shire.  County governments could no longer seed the airports and train stations with locals dressed up in costumes borrowed from The Music Man and dialogue straight from All in the Family.

Coastal Elite journalism would be forced to return to its home-place to report on its own tragedies, leaving Middle American back where is has always been. 

And then I opened yesterday's New York Times...

For Trump’s Aggrieved Defenders, This Impeachment Confirms Everything

His supporters see his second impeachment, a historic first, as the culmination of years of unfair treatment. The belief’s ubiquity shows the resilience of his message and the power of conservative media.

Well fuuuuck me.

OK, fine.  

Breathe.  

Relax.  

So what if Magic Ruralism (tm) is going to be a recurring blight on the land forever?  At least (I thought to myself) four years of Donald Trump has finally killed Both Siderism.  I mean, since it's been barely a week since Biden's inauguration, no one in their right mind will be going back to that poison well anytime soon, right?

And then Elie Mystal opened today's New York Times and told us about it:

And the reason for that is that this is edit not interested in presenting a well thought out opinion of PRINCIPLE, nor is it actually trying to PERSUADE anybody to do anything, or even rile up "the choir."...

It's just trying to play cowardly both side bullcrap.

— Elie Mystal (@ElieNYC) January 28, 2021

Brother Charlie Pierce antes up too:

You can read newspapers for 50 years and not see a newspaper tie itself in knots the way the Times does in this editorial. It acknowledges throughout that the new administration is facing rigid, if completely predictable, obstruction from Republican congressional majorities as it tries to do those things it was elected to do. But it insists that the most obvious solution to this completely man-made problem is just as much a problem as the obstruction itself.

Sigh. 

Twitter Update:

For those of you who have asked, yes, I immediately appealed my permanent suspension from Twitter.  The Twitter Hall Monitor got back to me right away and said they would review my appeal and let me know.  A week passed, I heard nothing, so I asked them for a status update.  I've still not heard anything.  So there you go.  

No Half Measures