Ebola Triumphalism

For decades, the lords and ladies of the GOP were only too happy to keep the lethal go-go juice that powered their party -- rage, racism, paranoia, Fake Christianity and invincible ignorance -- cooking along at a medium-boil.

After all, when their Pretty Hate Machine was set to six or seven ( From me thirteen years ago) --

-- it was sufficient to power their entire enterprise and keep the money and votes rolling in.

And when the Radioactive Base -- that collection of  every last species of botched American citizenship and knuckledragging bigot the GOP put in harness together under one whip to claw its way to power -- sometimes got too hot?  When the entire system started to shake and shudder and scare the living shit out of everyone else?  When suddenly people who were not members of the Beltway media Don't Ask/Don't Tell Club were nosing around inconvenient questions?

Well that's what the Liquid Bobo Koolant was for!

The Koolant system that keeps it all from blowing apart at the seams and melting itself back into the masturbatory fever dreams of every wannabe Jefferson Davis circulate a viscous Koolaid-based composite goo made up of 43% David Brooks, 27% Tom Friedman, 23% Tim Russert, 12% Joe Klein and 10% David Broder.

You say that’s 115%? Well fuck you and your fancy, liberal, Jebus-hating elitist “arithmetic” anyway.

If you press your ear to the containment shell you can hear in murmuring through the pipes:

“There are no crazies here.”

“The Southern Strategy is a myth.”

“Ignore Falwell, Dobson, and Reed. They’re Men of Faith.”

“Ignore Schlafly, Limbaugh and Hannity. They’re just the fringe”

“Ignore Robertson, Perle and Nordquist. They’re just amusingly provocative.”

“Gingrich isn’t a fascist; he’s just ‘controversial’.”

“Coulter isn’t really serious, even though she is the keynote speaker and commands top dollar at national Republican events, Republican media outlets and sold-out Wingnut Christian rallies.”

“That carcinoma spreading across your face? It looks just the Jesus, so you know it can’t be bad for you!”

“The Moderates really run the party.”

“The Center is where all right thinking people should be, despite the fact that in the last 30 years the Right has dragged the Center a million miles into Crazyville.”

“No matter how completely the GOP rapes American values, without a sliver of evidence to support this assertion you should still somehow believe that Liberals are either just as bad or worse.”

“The GOP cares about idiots like you.”

“There is no core in this reactor.”

To repeat: for decades this is how the GOP operated by design. 

With their Pretty Hate Machine set to six or seven.

And then Trump came down the escalator and turned it up to nine.

And why the hell wouldn't he?  Why shouldn't the wingnut base be told to be proud of their paranoia?  Why shouldn't they be told to embrace their Inner Klansman?

 After all, isn't that exactly what the lords and ladies of the GOP had been telling the base in winks and nods and nudges and dog-whistles for decades?  And since the lords and ladies of the GOP clearly thought keeping the base at a constant, medium, steamy bigoted boil was a good thing, why wouldn't cranking up the heat to nine and turning that base into screaming mob of wild, openly racist, superheated plasma be a great thing?

Of course, once the Pretty Hate Machine hits ten the shooting starts, but wheeeeee!  Who the fuck cares!

Have you not seen our ratings?

Have you not heard the roaring crowds?

Of course, we on the Left understand all of this better than anyone because this is exactly the warning we on the Left have been sounding for decades.

But what I will never be able to fully understand is the ghoulish hubris of so many Never Trumpers who worked so hard for so long to engineer a super-weapon so potent that it may finally kill our country.  I will never understand their amoral Ebola Triumphalism that does not move them towards repentance and contrition for what they have done --

You will get no such contrition, because I think your party had plenty of matches and lighter fluid and is not free of responsibility here.

— Tom Nichols (@RadioFreeTom) July 14, 2019

-- but instead perversely drives them to mock our democracy's autoimmune system for failing to stop their abominable creation from overwhelming it.

Yeah, it's our fault you became a party of racist bastards, all the way down.

— Charles P. Pierce (@CharlesPPierce) July 17, 2019

Indeed. It’s the Democrats fault that the GOP is now a convention of spineless shitweasles. If principled conservatism was an actual thing, we wouldn’t be in the pickle we find ourselves in.

— Mark Malek (@markdmalek) July 17, 2019

Sure I helped cook up a horrifying plague that's causing the country I purport to love to bleed out and die, but damn it, we were the the best god damn bioweapons engineers in our row and I demand you respect that!

Sorry boys, but Ice-9 will destroy the Earth and everything on it before I have anything but contempt for what you did to my country, and the Ebola Triumphalist pride you still take in having done it.

Behold, a Tip Jar!