Monday, April 25, 2016

Sunday Morning Comin' Down

Auto-Psychotic Asphyxiation Edition.

The torsional stress being caused by the drastic difference between the obvious truth about what is going on in American politics and the Approved Beltway Political  Narrative about what is going on in American politics is becoming so unbearable that the on-camera help they hire to deliver establishment talking points are being driven absolutely bull goose loony trying to square this impossible circle.

One of the most entertaining of the bunch was the still-inexplicably-employed Bloody Bill Kristol, who has settled on a strategy to filling a dry cleaning bag with old Dick Cheney Underoos, putting the bag over his head and then argle bargling out whatever random words pop into his depraved, oxygen-starved mind as he slowly passes out. This week's round of auto-psychotic asphyxiation featured:
KRISTOL: Well, let's take -- Jim Mattis happens to be a social liberal. He's more liberal than I am. He's very concerned about the debt. He's a strong national security hawk. Why wouldn't someone like him...

VANDEN HEUVEL: Because he hasn't been participating in the whole election. You will have -- there will be a riot in Cleveland...

KRISTOL: The facts. The facts. I'm saying if Trump was the Republican nominee, the laws permit independent candidates to petition to get on the ballot. It has happened. Ross Perot got 19 million votes. Jim -- or John Kelly, or many other people.

KRISTOL: Answer this question, George, the most recent Republican nominees: Mitt Romney, John McCain, George W. Bush, will any of them support Donald Trump for president? I'm not so sure they will. Would they prefer to support even someone like a retired General Mattis or Kelly or other possible candidate.

You know, since network executives now pay pundits to play parlor games with wholly fictional political scenarios on national teevee, maybe General James Mattoon Scott is available!

And speaking of democratic processes, was also pretty damn hilarious to see Bloody Bill taking an abrupt and intense interest in ballot access:
KRISTOL: The only thing that appeals to me is what Reince Priebus attacks as a dumb idea, which is giving the American people a better choice than Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, if Trump is the Republican nominee, which I agree looks increasingly like not a done deal. I think an independent candidacy is totally doable. I think it will happen. The ballot access problems are not. In the Super Bowl there are two --

STEPHANOPOULOS: -- coming up on the filing deadlines --

KRISTOL: -- oh, Texas, North Carolina. Every other state -- no other state's filing deadlines' before June 27th. You couldn't wait until the convention. You'd have to decide after Indiana, possibly after California. I think there will be legal challenges in Texas and North Carolina that the deadlines are too early.

In the '80s, five states were successfully challenged in federal court for having such early filing deadlines. And I think a lot of patriotic Americans are going to look at this choice and -- ranging from activists to donors to possible candidates and say the country deserves better than a Clinton-Trump choice.
One of the weird details you notice about Bloody Bill Kristol over time is that, as his he lies he tells pile up high enough to blot out the sun and his soul rots from within, his face keeps getting tinier and tinier.

There is a very credible theory that I just made up which states that within four years Kristol's face will disappear entirely and be replaced by a small sphincter that does nothing but fart out short quotes from Mein Kampf.

He will, of course, remain on teevee since he is obviously protected from on high by the Prince of Darkness but his appearances will continue to become more absurdist Dada and less Idi Amin Dada.

Meanwhile, on "Meet the Press", former RNC chair Mikey-Mike Steele auditioned for the part of Yoda's force ghost in Star Wars Episode VII by sitting very still and uttering meaningless epigrams --
MICHAEL STEELE: If they can stop someone, they can stop him.
-- while hoping that no one remembers that he helped to turn his party into the mindless, raving beast he now claims to deplore.


banker puppy said...

As I am reading Driftglass' theory about what will happen to Bill Kristol's face, a truck carrying a single port-a-potty drives by my home.

Clearly, there is a connection between the two. The cosmos must be giggling this morning.

dinthebeast said...

The Duffel Blog had a hilarious post about Mattis' candidacy:

-Doug in Oakland

Robt said...

Kristol continues to have wealthy influential support to propagandize Americans for profit.
He is the RNC's Id as what Saddam,s republican Guard chief propagandist was to Iraq.
Recall the battle cry before Iraq war? "The sands will run with American blood".

Oh, the fear.......................!

But, Kristol, unlike Charles Krauthammer, has a welfare job with FOX. Didn't know FOX's Murdoch and Ailes employed welfare of "Ideology-bots".

Throwing money at these pathetic figures by presenting them with welfare roles in media as experts of conservatism proves that they fiercely believe throwing money at something works.

It is hilarious to hear the GOP mantra that Hillary is unqualified etc etc etc. As if Cruz or Trump were?
They are given the RNC's court jester position. The king demand attendance and the Gesture rambles what the audience is to now think and repeat.

---engineering the will of the people by taking the willing and injecting the mantra of subordination.

"MICHAEL STEELE: If they can stop someone, they can stop him.
-- while hoping that no one remembers that he helped to turn his party into the mindless, raving beast he now claims to deplore."

Truth is so uncontrollable to restrain. Eventually rises to the surface.

Like the Joe feller in the morning. Unconsciously finding himself confessing the marketing of the Tea Party.

What they bring to the TV table is no different than what Putin delivers on his countries media networks.

No, I am not a robot, nor any cyberbot.

It makes the movie, They Live" look like a documentary.

Unknown said...

That Bill Kristol head is the best!

You're a f***ing artist.