Wednesday, January 06, 2016

Today In Both Sides Do It: The Mustache of Understanding



In a world where the universal reaction Tom Friedman's byline in the New York Times is "Gott im himmel, is that baloney shooter still around?", to be heard over the din of no one caring what he has to say about anything any more, these days the Mustache of Understanding must stretch himself.

And how better to really provoke the world into noticing he still exists than to break the hoariest, dumbest, most widely mocked cliche in American "journalism" out of his 22 car garage and take it for a ride around the block:
...
 If I were running for president, I’d approach politics in the same way: not as a liberal, a conservative, a libertarian or a centrist.

I’d run as an extremist.

The agenda that could actually make America great again would combine the best ideas of the extreme left and the extreme right...
And this:
It’s time for a true nonpartisan extremist, one whose platform combines the following...
Friedman then ticks off what is basically a bunch of standard-issue Liberal ideas --  single-payer health care, gun control, campaign finance reform, etc -- under a layer of deregulatory frosting.

And finishes off with this:
That calls for a nonpartisan extremist for president who’s ready to go far left and far right — simultaneously. That’s my 2020 vision, and in four years the country just might be ready for it.
When future historians ask "Who in their right minds could have taken this clown seriously?" they should note that Thomas Friedman writes for people just like Thomas Friedman.  Rich, useless dilettantes swaddled in layer upon layer of 1800-thread-count obliviousness who believed that the exotic opinions they cultivated in their insular hot-house of self-congratulatory billionaires and lackeys was an accurate map of the world.  

And who used the weight of their wealth, status and personal connections to inflict their idiocy on the rest of us no matter how loudly we Whos down Whoville did ruckus and roar.




5 comments:

trgahan said...

Another isolated, clueless billionaire conservative who proposers no matter who's in the White House and with outsized access to the public square spews his "I'm not FOR Trump, but..." scree so he can help maintain the illusion of intellectual conservatism among people who know better, but are too selfish and greedy to admit it.

I won't even ask for details on how this "extreme non-partisan" will deregulate but still afford single payer health care...magical free market pixie dust I guess.

crweaver said...

More proof that extremism in the pursuit of 'moderation' is no virtue.

Marion in Savannah said...

Let's not forget that he also wailed for more military spending... I guess being one of the major pimps for W's clusterfck didn't give him enough of a boner.

Kevin Holsinger said...

Good morning, Mr. Glass.

He's trying to portray the political spectrum as a circle, where if you go to both extremes simultaneously, you end up at the same, centrist point...a kind of alternate Earth that exists on the exact opposite side of the Sun as ours.

In reality, the political spectrum is a line, and you can't go both ways at the same time...which is why you don't see many climate-change-denying ecoterrorists.

Not sure what song I feel would be better for Mr. Friedman...

..."King of the Forest" from "The Wizard of Oz"...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSV_3KCoS2M

...or "Now You're a Man" from "Orgazmo"...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tx1mryKqvT8

Be seeing you.

John Marriott said...

We may be witnessing the birth of a new Friedman unit: "in four years the country just might be ready for it." Just 4 years of Hillary or He, Trump or Ted or Marco and we'll have seen enough. We'd be ready for change. Just 4 years. After 30+ years of enduring the most retro, unenlightened, yes, crazy politics and destructive policies, we will suddenly see what we really need to do to fix our economy and restore our standing in the world. Just 4 more years. Really. 4 years.