Every aspiring Beltway pundit knows the Royal Road to fame and fortune is the Dave Brooks Highway, and yesterday it was Frank Bruni's turn to pop the top on the Both Siderist convertible and take a leisurely drive through the Safe Center of American punditry (h/t Alert Reader "IR" for calling this to my attention.)
It's really a very easy.
First, since the evidence of the Republican Party's dementia and nihilistic fanaticism is now overwhelming and absolutely unimpeachable, it is necessary to establish one's honest-broker pundit cred by acknowledging the existence of the rabid beast which is staring you right in the face:
...One of our two major political parties is hostage to an extreme subgroup that won’t brook compromise, values theatrical protests over actual governing and is adolescent in its ideological vanity.Of course Boehner couldn’t last: He’s an adult. And as Donald Trump’s perverse currency and a Republican nominating contest that’s often indistinguishable from a temper tantrum demonstrate, the qualities of maturity, steadiness and prudence aren’t in especially big favor right now with an animated, engaged and frighteningly influential segment of the Republican electorate.
But then it is vital to pivot immediately to the safe harbor of Both Siderism by positing an equally vast yet mysteriously invisible Army of Dirty Hippies on the Left, which "journalists" ominously refuse to talk about:
...I’m not saying that the Republican Party alone has wing nuts, disrupters, brats. Too often that’s the impression left by journalists ruing the G.O.P.’s unruly ways.But Democrats over recent years haven’t been bedeviled by internal dissent and rendered dysfunctional to the extent that Republicans have. They’ve kept something of a lid on things and maintained a semblance of order.
See, it's all just tactics. Both parties are equally crazy, uncompromising, vain, immature, perverse and tantrum-y. It's just that the Democrats cover it all up better than the GOP.
Who would have guessed that the Dirty Hippies were so powerful that they could be just as whiny, nihilistic, volatile and batshit crazy as the GOP while at the same time being such brilliant and disciplined tacticians that they can keep any actual evidence of their whiny, nihilistic, volatile, batshit craziness from leaking out into the real world?
Frank Bruni, that's who.