Dear Magazine Editors,
I work well with others.
Always make my deadlines.
And am usually 4-20 years ahead of the curve.
I can build a formidable paragraph while at the same time composing original, incisive graphics.
Like the one above.
And hundreds more.
I am also reasonably priced.
driftglass99 AT gmail DOT com
By the way, New Republic, this gag really doesn't make sense unless you indicate in some way that you are slyly riffing on the 1999 cult hit, "Being John Malkovich".
Perhaps if you were renting my services I could spare you little mistakes like this :-)