One of the most Perfectly Wretched

car-wrecks of words I've read in weeks came was summoned into existence on August 30 by Howard Kurtz of the Washington Post:

Time has lost a few big-name contributors as well, including Michael Kinsley, Andrew Sullivan and Bill Kristol. And Stengel, a speechwriter for Bill Bradley's presidential campaign, has no prominent conservative to balance liberal columnist Joe Klein.

Pause for a moment to consider how many dismally dishonest Villager Eternal Verities are enfolded in this single sentence.

Then consider this was merely a loin cut taken out of Howard Kurtz's most recent print-edition bid for "Time/Warner Salesman of the Month" (Motto: "As you all know first prize is a Cadillac El Dorado. Anyone wanna see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired.") by diligently oiling the love gun of Time Magazine front-man and fellow Time/Warner employee Rick Stengel in what was essentially (as Glenn Greenwald says here)...

...a gushing love letter to Time Magazine and its executives.
...
What makes this so amazing is that Kurtz himself does not merely sound like an employee of Time Warner; he is one. Time Warner pays him a substantial salary -- and gives him a prominent television platform -- for hosting CNN's Sunday morning show, Reliable Sources. In return, Kurtz then uses his Post column to glorify Time Warner's magazine and its executives. The fact that The Washington Post employs as its media critic an employee of Time Warner, the largest media conglomerate in the world, has to be the most mammoth and inexcusable conflict of interest in American journalism, one that simply cannot be cured even with full disclosure.

...and what turned out to also be a mere prequel to Rick Stengel's appearance on Howard Kurtz's Time/Warner-owned media criticism teevee show -- Reliable Sources -- on Sunday, September 5th, where they basically regurgitated much of Kurt'z column as dialogue instead of monologue:

...
KURTZ: Speaking of a difficult economy, you have had to lay off about roughly a quarter of your staff in the last four years since you've been editor. So, in a way, you're making do with fewer bodies, so of course you're going to do less reporting.

STENGEL: Well, and in fact -- but, you know, everybody has to do more, as you know. I mean, look at how much you do. I mean, everybody has to do everything. They have to report, they have to blog, they -- we know they're carrying video cameras. So, in a way, everybody has to do more with less, and we have done more with less, and we've done it across all -- every different platform -- online, on mobile, as well as on the traditional paper product.

KURTZ: Rick, you've just hired Fareed Zakaria, whose "GPS" program on CNN precedes mine. And you have, of course, Joe Klein, well-known liberal writer and columnist.

Now, with all the hiring that you've done, how have you not managed to find a conservative columnist?

STENGEL: I would love to find one. So I'm talking -- if you're listening and you're a fantastic conservative columnist, and you want to write for "TIME," give me a call.
...

Once you have hosed the many, many layers of incestuous Villager groupthink sploog off of this ass-sniffing contest, the Alert Reader will note this little peanut of fact in the big puddle of poo: For all its power and reach, Time magazine cannot find a single conservative thinker capable of rubbing two adjectives together with sufficient skill to clear even the hideously debased standard set by a clown like

Bill Fucking Kristol.

To be insulted by these fascists
Is so degrading.