Talk To The Hand

'Cause the brain's loooong gone...

As you probably know by now, the Great White Hope of the GOP for some reason had to surreptitiously jot her bedrock beliefs down on the palm of her hand

so she could regurgitate them on cue like owl pellets made of bumper-stickers and Jebus during a fawning "interview" at Rube-Con 2010.

(driftglass aside 1:
If her handlers had wanted to diffuse the situation and pick up a little hipster street cred, they could have said that she had written "Not Pennys Boat" on her hand in solidarity with "Lost" fans.

But, lets face it, if they were that bright they wouldn't be Republicans.)

(driftglass aside 2:
I hear she was going to write a lot more stuff.
But she quit.
For the good of Alaska.
You Betcha!)

This was, of course, shortly after she had gotten the Pig People up on their hind legs whooping and hollering their derision at the President of the United States for being a "charismatic guy with a TelePromper".

Of course, a week before, this same "empty suit" had somehow managed to utterly destroy the entire Republican Brain Caste, live and on teevee without the benefit of notes, graphs, charts, prompters, or his core beliefs boiled down to seven words scribbled onto the palm of his hand so he wouldn't forget them.

But of course, those facts don't fit into the tiny, little heads of the Pig People or their Queen...so don the memory hole they go, go, go.

Shameless Conservative Revisionist Andrew Sullivan suggests that, if you want to learn more about the Terrible!True!Story! of how and why Conservatism sucks ass, you hustle on over to Amazon and drop 20 bucks on his 2007 book, in which be boldly "predicts" the downfall of Conservatism...

"If the context, meaning and implications of this sort of conservatism still befuddle you, if you still think of yourself as a conservative but do not fathom how a former beauty queen sportscaster is now most likely the future of the GOP, please read my prediction and analysis of this development in "The Conservative Soul: Fundamentalism, Freedom and the Future Of The Right."

...some 20 years after Conservatism's funeral was over and the body had long since gone to rot.

I, on the other hand, suggest you stay tuned for a long post from me in which very I politely explain to Mr. Sullivan why he really needs to shut the fuck up forever.