Thursday, August 13, 2009

As the Rules of Progressive Succession clearly state...



...each year, at least one dirty fucking hippie must sit out the annual Liberal Loya Jirga. This is to insure that in case of catastrophe, an intact Liberal movement can continue on with the important work of supporting President Obama's ambitious program of liquidating our unproductive seniors (Motto: "Don't Resusc Anyone Over 60!"), and giving Conservative Hate Radio apostles someone to blame for their tiny penises the horror of their existence.

So, as the 4,677,322nd in the line of dirty fucking hippie succession, this year it fell to me to remain behind to hit on the convention-goers girlfriends for the good of everyone.

Also I ran the numbers from three different angles and it turns that I can get local Chicagoans to tell me there is no future for people like me in blogging for less than half of what it would cost me to go to Pittsburgh and hear it from strangers :-)

Have fun, citizens, and let me know how it goes.

9 comments:

tata said...

I'm staying home, too. We could - um - talk about cheese or something.

Asian-American Pundit said...

You took the words out of my mouth. I too will not be able to attend as I was told by the Drinking Liberally crew to "hold the fort." Not sure what that means, but I have so far hoarded tons of pillows, sheets and 30 packs of Old Style.

Anonymous said...

You are priceless dg, just priceless.

Fran / Blue Gal said...

I, too, stayed behind to lick my BlogHer wounds. I hope to be able to go next year, but then I fear for my sanity in the grand halls of yet another convention. I really truly don't like it out there amongst the English.

Perhaps next year you could lend me some castle wenches, dg, and they and I could form a posse of libidinous liberal lasses to break into Marko's room, run a bath for you, and empty out the minibar.

Tengrain said...

Ha - I forgot about how last year they told everyone who wasn't an A-List blogger to consolodate or quit!

The Dittoheads of the Left, the Kossacks have become the thing that they once mocked.

Regards,

Tengrain

darkblack said...

Now what would I do at a convention? Sell spatulas?

;>)

Malacandra said...

Your friends here speak of you with fondness and raise a glass to absent ones.

The Minstrel Boy said...

dude, i'm having a ball. beautiful women keep kissing me on the cheek.

not the kind of action i'm used to, but, it's fun in its own way.

Blader said...

Did I miss the invitation somehow?