Sunday Morning Comin’ Down

The “If your gonna be running a buncha programs all at once, you’re gonna need a Rahm upgrade” edition.

Since arm-breaker Rahm Emanuel was spotted this weekend at the Mouse Circus more often than Cialis and Exxon commercials combined, here’s the skinny on the selection of the Congressman from Illinois’ 5th district as President-Elect Barack Obama's Chief of Staff.

See, years ago when the Christopaths kicked reason and compromise out of the Party of God , some of us came to the conclusion that trying to reason with Bush Regime Dead-Enders and the 48 million throwbacks who voted on November 4th to put them back into power is ridiculous.

That trying to enlist these cultural arsonists in fixing what they’ve spent 25 years burning to the ground is laughable.

Hope is great. Collegiality is great. I’m all for them.

But should the wretched whelplings of Jefferson Davis decide to get uppity, you're gonna need a sonofabitch standing ready

with Plan B (Not work safe).

Over on “Fox News Sunday” Chris Wallace asked:

"Liberal Economist Paul Krugman says the Progressive Agenda won. Do you agree?"

driftglass: You mean "Nobel Prize winning" economist, right?

Then came the long and painful "Whither Wingnttia?" section, in which Reps. Mike Pence, R-Ind., and Eric Cantor, R-Va played Republican Buck Buck; packing their pockets with lies and jumping desperately onto Reality's back, trying to make it collapse.

Wallace: Wasn't this a realigning election?

Buck Buck number one coming!

Cantor: This was not some kind of shift towards some European-style Socialist stinky-cheese faggy gummint. It was a massive distrust of gummint, which fucks up everything. Its not about left versus right; its about right versus wrong. And the only make Jebus happy is to cut gummint, cut taxes and suck harder on Reagan's dick.

Buck Buck number two coming!

Pence: This was not a progressive or liberal victory.

Wallace: Yeah, but Obama actually stood for some things.

Buck Buck number three coming!

Pence: This was not victory for liberalism. This was a victory for Barack Obama. Besides, Rich Lowry said that most people don’t embrace a European-style Socialist stinky-cheese faggy gummint.

driftglass: And who could doubt a sober and levelheaded assessment of what Murrica wants by Rich "Lil' Starbursts" Lowry?

Wallace: You said your job is to oppose, dismantle and defeat the Liberal agenda. Doesn’t sound very bipartisan to me?

Pence: Our job is to oppose. Mindlessly and reflexively oppose anything Democrats ever try to do until the end of time.

Wallace: OK, but look at these numbers. You are having your ass handed to you everywhere.

Buck Buck number four coming!

Cantor: Yes, the numbers are startling. We have to have a vision. Barack Obama hip-mo-tized the Murrican people! Also he used Teh Internets. We will have to use computers more and start using cooler words.

Wallace: But John McSame ran on exactly those issues. And he got beaten with a hammer. People ain’t buying what you're selling. I don't this was all about the charm of Barack Obama.

Buck Buck number five coming!

Pence: The people voted for change, but change must be built on the time-honored traditions of Reaganism and scaring the crap out of white trash gas-sippers.

Later, Brit Hume explained that now is not the time for the Republican Party to re-invent itself. If Obama tries to drag the country too far to the Left it will be unpopular and it will fail. Liberals don’t call themselves “Liberals”. They call themselves Progressives. Liberalism is still a political philosophy that dare not speak its name.

This is a center-right country.

Wallace to Kristol: So, your friend, Sarah Palin. Stupid or brain-damaged?

Kristol: Reporters shouldn’t print stuff that hasn’t been attributed or verified.

Says the Clown Prince of the “Some People Say…”

network.

Shorter Republican self-diagnosis:

If we dress up our Prime Directive with better gerunds and CGI so it sounds more changey--

-- everything will work out fine.

Good luck with that.

On ”The Chris Matthews Show”, Matthews explained that:

"Bush and Clinton both had “name” problems. Clinton had “Monica” and Bush had “Katrina”.

and in doing so, offhandedly encapsulates why having an utterly, amoral, horse race-driven trivia machine instead of an actual, y'know, media, is a bad idea.

Here we see the core moral-idiot-savant nature of the pundit classes; that they cannot comprehend the difference between the climactic faux crisis at the end of years of wingnut-ginned-up scandals, and a real, national catastrophe at the hands of bandits and monsters.

Later, David Fucking Brooks explains that: "Bush is a lot smarter than people think he is."

Shorter David Fucking Brooks: "Buck Buck number six coming!"