Sunday Morning Comin’ Down -- Part 1

In which we will graciously ignore the fact that positions for which Liberals were being called fringe, soldier-hating, pro-terrorist traitors one year ago…are now positions being hastily embraced as “reasonable” by more and more members of the Grand Old Party…

…right up until they’re in our gunsights.

As usual, all quotes have been snarkily transliterated, but are chock full of yummy yummy verisimilitude.

On Fox News

Wallace warns the Democrats on his show

(Charley Rangel, Barney Frank and John Dingell, all safely far away and out of finger-jamming-into-Wallace-smirking-pie-hole range. )

(And may I point out, by the way, that there is literally no way to say “Rangel, Frank and Dingell” that doesn’t sound really funny.)

that there is “A strong push from the Liberal, Left Wing of your party.” And asks “Will you govern from the center, or go completely Communist and sell us all out to the terrorists?”

Rangel: Maybe raising the minimum wage goes over as extreme at the Wallace Plantation, Chris, but for the rest of the country that doesn’t feed at the Murdoch teat, it’s a fairly large and uncontroversial matter.

Wallace: But…but…but…taxes! And abortion! And queers! Oh my!

Wallace asks fleetingly about the draft (and Rangel answers well) but only en route to this question…

Wallace: But what about Teh Gays? Your Sekrit Agenda to gay up the military? Isn’t it true you want more fags in the Army? Huh? Huh? Maybe American-flag-burning fags?

Frank: Jesus, you people just can’t help picking these irrelevant fucking fights, can you? Liberal? Are you shitting me? They’re our issues now because the right wing extremist who run the GOP have abandoned the center to us in favor of these ridiculous wedge issues that are all you douchbags talk about anymore.

Wallace: The Congressional Black Caucus has said its 100% behind appointing an impeached judge to the Intelligence Committee. What about that, Black Congressman?

Rangel: I don’t know anything about that. What I do know is the CBC hasn’t even met yet, much less reached a position on the matter of Alcee Hastings, so I don’t know where the fuck you’re getting your information.

driftglass translation: Wallace is a liar. That he is still on the air is a crime. That Fox still has an audience is definitive proof that about 1/4 of the adults in this country are a waste of carbon who cannot be redeemed or reasoned with.

Frank: Chris, you have an odd view of “balance”. We have a lot of very important issues to discuss, and every one of your questions are weasely little attempts to find some points of contention. They’re deliberately divisive and inflammatory. How ashamed your father must be to have sired a filthy little disappointment like you.

driftglass translation: Fox is run by and for people who loathe this country. It is not a member of the Fourth Estate; it is Rupert Murdoch’s Fascist fifth column.
Period.

Next up. Trent Lott. Who, Wallace chirps, is “The Comeback Kid”.

Oh Lordy.

Lott is a GOP Jukebox: drop in a nickel and he’ll spit out bumper sticker slogans and sentence fragments, one after another, all day long. They don’t make any sense, and they don’t form any coherent sentences. They are just market-tested nonsense syllables that Lott firehoses out in every direction to keep Ugly Reality at bay.

Today, Lott’s Iraq Policy was…

At some point…

Soon…

We are approaching…

We are nearing a moment at which we will no longer…

We have invested a lot in Iraq with little to show for it…

We all need to work together – Republicans, Democrats, the President...

Within the space of one breathe, Lott can scuttle from saying “we need to get out of Iraq soon” to “we need to mindlessly support the Dear Leader no matter what”. But the Parti Line and the Memo of the Day dictates is that it is the Evil Liberals who have no consistent positions, so Wallace lets it all slide.

I have no idea what Lott’s bleating added up to, but from what I gather he’d like to thank hisMomandJesushispersonalLordandSavior.

And he’s gonna give 110%.

And he’s going to Disneyland!

Also, I learned that we didn’t get a minimum wage increase because the Democrats blocked it, like they obstructed everything.

Which is, of course, an utter lie. The minimum wage died because the Republicans tied an anchor to its throat: a massive tax cut for the wealthy. They poisoned it to the point where no responsible person would vote for it, and then tried to run on Democratic “opposition” to the minimum wage.

Of course Wallace is never going to mention that central fact – any more than Brit Hume was going to own up to the fact that he had completely lied about Franklin Roosevelt’s original intent regarding Social Security when that program was on the GOP chopping block last year

Fox exists to perform the ritual sliming of every Democrats and the ritual fellating of every Republicans. It is Ku Klux Kabuki by the GOPs pet teabagging “reporters” on behalf of their disgraced Party of thieves and degenerates.

So why would the GOP play such sadistic politics with the lives of the working poor?

Because they are bad people.

Because in the Age of Dubya you can either be a Good Republican or a Good American, but you can no longer be both.


On Face the Nation (with Gloria Borge) Senators-Elect Bob Corker, Claire McCaskill and Sherrod Brown.

Short McCaskill: The Bush Iraq policy has failed. The voters overwhelmingly repudiated it.

Short Sherrod Brown: There are more and more Republicans who believe we need to get out of Iraq. Who want more accountability.

Funny, he doesn’t look black.

Funny how Rush Limbaugh could have made that mistake back in February.

Of don't you remember this:

“Maybe somebody in the party has figured this out. And don't forget, Sherrod Brown is black. There's a racial component here, too. And now, the newspaper that I'm reading all this from is The New York Times, and they, of course, don't mention that. But -- you know, "Democratic leaders say that Representative Sherrod Brown, a seven-term incumbent from Avon, has a far better chance of toppling Senator DeWine than does the -- Hackett."

Of course after he was wrong, called out for being wrong, and made one of his patented Rush “apologies” (“I’m sorry the evil liberal media caught my irrelevant little boo-boo, but how was I supposed to know that some white dimmocrat has a Darkie name?”)

Again, like Iraq, like Katrina, like every-damned-thing, Republicans will always pound and twist and torque and finally just eradicate the facts to make them fit around their ridiculous dogma.

And when shown literally in black-and-white that they are wrong, wrong, wrong…it doesn’t matter one iota.

If the pig-people who listen in earnest to Rush, or Sean, or Savage, or O’Reilly are programmed this week to believe the Earth is flat, you could fill an ocean with globes and toss them into it, then walk them around the entire world a dozen times at a dozen latitudes, then fire them into space and have them orbit the planet for a year, then take a snow shovel with a Mercator Map painted on the blade repeatedly upside their heads…and they’d still call you a dirty Liberal who is obviously in league with the terrorists and their lying Round Earth collaborators.

There is no cure for their kind short of electoral and cultural extinction.

Short Corker? Honestly I don’t really give a damn what Corker has to say. He doesn’t interest me here any more than The Govenator interested me over on Meet the Press

End Part 1.