Monday, October 10, 2005

Ignorant Fucknozzle embarrasses Christ again.


Film at eleven.

Mr. Cranium over at the All Spin Zone caught this little jewel circling the drain.

From The Australian News:

TV evangelist renews Chavez attacks
From correspondents in Washington
10oct05

PROMINENT US TV evangelist Pat Robertson has accused Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez of giving Osama bin Laden $US1.2 million after the September 11 attacks and of trying to obtain nuclear material from Iran.

Mr Robertson caused uproar in August when he called during his televised religious program for the US government to assassinate Chavez. He later was forced to apologise to the leftist leader.

But the conservative preacher issued a new denunciation of Chavez yesterday, local time, in an interview with CNN.

"The truth is, this man is setting up a Marxist-type dictatorship in Venezuela, he's trying to spread Marxism throughout South America, he's negotiating with the Iranians to get nuclear material and he also sent $US1.2 million in cash to Osama bin Laden right after 9/11," Mr Robertson said.

"I apologised and I said I will be praying for him, but one day we will be staring nuclear weapons and it won't be (Hurricane) Katrina facing New Orleans, it's going to be a Venezuelan nuke," Mr Robertson said.

"So my suggestion was, isn't it a lot cheaper sometimes to deal with these problems before you have to have a big war," he added.
...


And the money shot is...
Asked how he had obtained information on Chavez giving money to bin Laden, Robertson said: "Sources that came to me. That's what I was told."


Boom.

That’s fundiespeak for, “I pulled it out of my ass, but since my flock are brain-dead poo-flingers, I can always just chalk it up to Jesus.”

Robertson is no more or less dangerous than botulism in a test tube. What makes him a cancer of our country is the disease vector of his followers. The fact that there are millions and millions of Americans who are so completely, mentally strip-mined that when this squirmy, squirrelly embarrassment of a human being comes on teevee they actually stop what they’re doing and scream to all squatting, squalid fellow denizens of their double-wides to get in here, ‘cause The Reverend’s On!

They are the problem, and while their sub-species are certainly not unique to America, what is unique, as Richard Dawkins once pointed out, is that there are silly, ignorant people in Britain too (for example), but they don’t let them have political power. What's unique about America is that here we have the Republican Party: degenerates who let dangerously crazy hate-hucksters like Robertson ass-rape the Party of Lincoln all day, every day, in exchange for a little electoral reach-around every now and then.

Generation by generation, you can judge the health of the American political process on a sliding scale of vibrant to flat-lining. And as long as Christ-molesting roaches like Robertson wield political clout and are leading a flock instead of running for their lives being chased by a mob, we’re still in the ER, hanging on to life by force of will.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

What makes him a cancer of our country is the disease vector of his followers.

Beautiful line, and great insight. Not much different than the yahoo's in Waco, or Guyana, or the UFO cult in CA a few years back. People who have given up so much of themselves they'll crawl into a burlap back to be hit with baseball bats when "Dear Leader" says so. In those situations anyone who maintains any self-respect would put dear leader in the bag and show the other what to do with a pinata.

But nobody beats DG in verbal pinata with the fundies!

jurassicpork said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

I'm not laughing at you, Drifty, I'm laughing with you. And at Captain Assclown.

If this bird was any stupider, he'd be contagious.

Anonymous said...

Speakin of pinatas...

http://www.evilpinatas.com/front_page.jsp

I have to disclaim - i have no affiliation or financial interest with this site, but thought their wares might find an interested consumer or two hangin around Ye Olde Driftte Glasse Staken-Ale.
After all it's about the healing power of words, and the catharsis of pulverizing your favorite douchbag (if only in effigy).
Cheers,
-Skunqesh

E. Normus Johnson said...

And wouldn't it be interesting to know what that poo-flingin' Dobby Dobson heard to make him sign off on Miss Jane Hathaway? That he really shouldn't know?

Interesting times.

Anonymous said...

Squnqesh,

Nice find :-) I thought I was only joking. All praise to the internets...

Anonymous said...

I love it:
"That’s fundiespeak for, “I pulled it out of my ass, but since my flock are brain-dead poo-flingers, I can always just chalk it up to Jesus.”

I like how those words roll off the tongue: Brain Dead Poo Flinger. *sigh*

On the contrary, I say if Robertson claims to have knowledge that is of vital National Security, Supoena that bastard and make him tell us everything he knows. The same goes for James "I can't tell you" Dobson. Ve haff vays uff makeen you tok.

If anyone wants a laugh, check out the latest parody political video "Hey LaLa" at my site www.file83.com. It's a hoot.

Anonymous said...

"The Brain-Dead Poo Flingers" WBAGNFARB!

OH, this isn't Dave Barry's blog? Well, I just hope it's not Being-Hit-On-The-Head Lessons in here!

Expecting the Spanish Inquisition, IBW

Anonymous said...

The trouble is your Brain-dead Poo Flingers are trying desperatly hard to export their poison to Europe. Here in Holy Catholic Ireland I see very worrying signs of erer growing wingnuttery.

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