Incontinent Republican Douchebag mysteriously not dead yet.

Perhaps bathing in the blood of the innocent really does extend their worthless lives?

I never understood certain of the lyrics in “Dixie” until I caught on that the “just” was silent.

"Just look away
Just look away
Just look away, Dixieland."

Pretend it never happened.

Pretend that the Antebellum South was, century after century, nothing but a sun-kissed Disneyland of gracious good manners and happy Negroes singing happy spirituals and happily submitting to, well, you can’t “rape” property can you?

And happily bear Massa’s bastard children…which kind of explains that whole “no exception for rape” plank of the Wingnut Christian Anti-Choice brigade: after all “rights” are reserved for human beings, not chattel like niggers, women, dogs and cattle.

Which brings us to the Grand High Exalted Mystic Wizard Dragon Emeritus of all of the modern mossy, room-temperature-IQ Shining Path Republican pretenders to the Lizard King Throne. Yes, the arch-segregationist thug himself, and the vanguard of the history-molesting revisionists who have mutated the Party of Lincoln into the Party of American terrorist and traitor, Jefferson Davis -- Mr. Jesse Helms – has done ‘rote hisself a Book.

Helms ran openly as a race-baiting Segregationist and was elected and re-elected by the chittering inbreeders of North Carolina FIVE times. Which, in all seriousness, tells anyone with more than eleven functioning and contiguous brain cells everything you need to know about the true, dark heart of the modern Evil Dead Paleo-Republican Party.

Helms was and is an international embarrassment and the quintessential enemy of true American values and virtues, and in any sane Universe the Republican party would be tumbling all over themselves like horny puppies to see who could repudiate him quickest.

But sadly, in this universe, Neo Confederates, unreconstructed segregationists and the direct spiritual decendants of the bible-thumping hucksters who once preached that God Loves Slavery, far from being run out of the GOP, now just run it. And elected officials who should be fleeing Helms’ legacy as from a phalanyx of plague bearing process-servers, are instead all trying on his cool white robes and clown shoes and fighting for a place in the mirror to make sure their point hats are on straight.

Here’s the article...and don’t let the headline fool you: this is no fucking apology. Republicans don't "do" apologies:

Helms Apologetic on AIDS in Memoir
The Associated Press
Thursday, June 9, 2005; 9:38 AM

In his upcoming memoir, former Sen. Jesse Helms acknowledges he was wrong about the AIDS epidemic but believes integration was forced before its time by "outside agitators who had their own agendas."
...
Helms, 83, was one of the state's leading voices of segregation as a TV commentator in Raleigh in the 1960s and opposed nearly every civil rights bill while in the Senate. He has never retracted his views on race or said segregation was wrong.

In the book, Helms suggests he believed voluntary racial integration would come about without pressure from the federal government or from civil rights protests that he said sharpened racial antagonisms.

"We will never know how integration might have been achieved in neighborhoods across our land, because the opportunity was snatched away by outside agitators who had their own agendas to advance," according to the uncorrected proof. "We certainly do know the price paid by the stirring of hatred, the encouragement of violence, the suspicion and distrust."

Helms also was an outspoken opponent of laws to protect homosexuals from discrimination and of funding for AIDS research, but he writes in the book that his views evolved during his final years in the Senate. He cited friendships he developed with North Carolina evangelist Franklin Graham and rock singer Bono, both of whom got him involved in the fight against the AIDS epidemic in Africa.

"Until then," Helms writes, "it had been my feeling that AIDS was a disease largely spread by reckless and voluntary sexual and drug-abusing behavior, and that it would probably be confined to those in high risk populations. I was wrong."

First, let’s dispense with this despicable creature’s bullshit about his sudden concern for AIDS sufferers. When run through the Klansman-to-Human translator on Bablefish, Helms’ remarks on the subject come out like so: “Well when I found out that it warn’t just trash like queers and Damnyankees and nigger junkies what could die from th’ AIDS, but Confederate Christian White Folk too, well that's a lynchin’ of a whole different color.”

As to the rest, well, we know you, old man. You’re as old as history...

You’re the brave little priest who donkey-punched Galileo until he recanted.

Who wouldn’t look through a microscope ‘cause there ain’t no germs in the Bible.

Who whispered it all over town that Jews poison wells.

Who took his son out to see the pretty fires all those burning books made.

Who took his daughter out to see them string up and burn that uppity niggra.

Who stood up and yelled “Witch!”

Who stood up and yelled “Commie!”

Who knew God loved slavery and hated Yanks, ‘cuz the preacher man told you so.

Who applauded God-fearing courts and judges for things like "Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix."

Who believed with all your tiny, shriveled heart in “Segregation Now. Segregation Tomorrow. Segregation Forever.”

Who don’t want no Christ-haters teachin’ mah son that he come from no monkey.

And now your ilk run the most powerful nation on Earth for one simple reason: not a single one of the so-called Republican Moderates has the balls and personal integrity to stand up to thugs like Helms and toss their bony, racist hatemongering asses out of the Party of Lincoln.

These false Christians will gleefully scream for Clinton’s blood for seven long years, and then fall mysteriously silent, drop to their knees and bellycrawl in perfect obeisance when actual monsters like Helms stalk the Earth.

These faithless Christians apparently didn’t get the memo that God hates a coward worse that he hates a hypocrite, so take a wild guess how fucked you are with the Almighty when it -- surprise! -- turns out that you’re both?

Just look away, cowards.

Just look away.

(ed. note: Thank to Anonymous for correcting me. I got my Carolinas inverted and have fixed same; it's what I get for blogging in the wee, small ones when I should be out working my Jedi mind tricks on libidenous liberal lasses at local watering holes. He or she said, "South Carolina had Strom Thurmond. We lucky, lucky North Carolinians had Jesse. but its better for me now. I live in Pa and have Rick Santorum. The more things change...." which I think sums the Party of God up pretty well.)

(ed. note to Republicans: See, this is what you do when you get something wrong. Instead of shrieking that Anonymous is an America-hating traitorous, objectively pro-terrorist moonbat for pointing out the obvious fact that I fucked up, you a-p-o-l-o-g-i-z-e and correct the error. Now I get to happily get on with my day -- which will involve taking in the Cubs v. Boston Red Stockings game today -- and while you have to slouch through your dreadful lives willfully and persistently defending the liars and poltroons who treat you like whores. )