Friday, February 09, 2024

Air Force One

OPEN ON:  Scene from Air Force One.

CUT TO:  Harrison Ford.

Hi.  I'm Harrison Ford.  I'm an actor.  In my movie, Air Force One, I play the president of the United States.  In that movie, I have several punchfights with Russian terrorists and, in the end, I win.

Because I'm an actor and it's a movie.

Some of you don't seem to understand this, so let me explain.  

In movies, presidents sometimes have punchfights with Russian terrorists, or fly fighter jets against alien invaders, or have running gun battles in the White House.

But in the real world, that's not what presidents do.

MONTAGE Joe Biden doing all of the following:

VO:

In the real world, our best presidents have always lead by listening patiently to all sides of complex problems, consulting the best minds, and then making tough decisions.  

They've stood with working men and women and worked hard to make their lives a little better.

They comforted the afflicted.  They helped us grieve our collective losses.  When they represented us to the rest of the world, they did it with dignity.  And they tried every day to remind us that we are all Americans and we are all in this together.

And by that measure, Joe Biden has been a damn good president. 

And yeah, he's my age.  He's an old guy.  He's a smart old guy.  He's a  tough old guy.  He's a decent and honorable old guy.

So this November, I'm voting for the old guy.

Because this isn't a movie.  This is real life.  Your real life.  Your family's real life.  And the stakes are too high for us to screw this up.


 

No Half Measures




3 comments:

Marc McKenzie said...

Perfect, Driftglass. Absolutely perfect.

Best thing I've seen so far today.

Jon Sitzman said...

(1) Love it and that's awesome. Like seriously if you can somehow reach Mr. Ford himself, I'd send him this concept.

(2) Harry Ford learned those solid right hands from his Nazi-punching Indy Jones days. He gets 'em honest.

(3) Quite frankly punching Nazis and punching Russian terrorists is, hmm, a bit of a blurred line at this point. (Not all Russians are terrorists. All Nazis are terrorists.)

(4) Thanks for all you do.

Robt said...

Scuttle butt is , Ticker in speaking with Putin agreed to produce a remake of Air Force One.

Using Trump as president, even though they cannot keep the toilet paper off his shoe.

In this version, Trump loses a 2nd election bid and takes control of Air Force one with help of the Russian MAGA.

When the elected president orders AIR Force One shot down before it reaches Moscow's Trump flees there.
Ticker realizing the peril of being shot down. Slithers his way to the presidential escape capsule and bails on Trump.
Tucker lands safely in the ocean where a Russian sub rescues him so he can return to Moscow to be used for a interview staged by Putin to save face and propagandize MAGA.
After the AR One is shot down, Putin endorses Nutti Haley along with the sole surviving Koch Brother and Rupert Murdoch. As the American GOP mourns the lose of the Cult King The rise of COBEA and with Mike Johnson gather to hold a religious ceremony to dispel Satan.
I won't spill this by telling how it all ends to hold the suspense. I will tickle your interest which it involves the Federalist Society oligarchs and the SCOTUS clones and A.I..
All of this put into play by another movie where the Hue Hewitt Robot travels back in time to destroy us all Bit (another movie) comes into play when the Lone Star and Chewy duo have the power of the Schwartz with them to defeat the dark side MAKA-Vader-ists.

A continuing part two is already in the works.