Tom Nichols: New Apple, Same Razor

My very good personal friend Tom "You'll get no contrition from me Libtards!" Nichols has an article in The Atlantic today.  Which is just awesome!  Good for him!

Since Tom's article is presently being hailed as the greatest essay on the state of American and culture since de Tocqueville warned that rock and roll and jazz cigarettes were gonna ruin them kids, I thought I'd better read it to help educate myself on the state of American politics and culture.  

I learned from Tom that Donald Trump was a terrible person for whom "we" are all responsible.  This is good information!  

I also learned that Donald Trump did terrible damage to America during his four years in office -- damage for which "we" are all collectively responsible and which "we" must now all work to repair.  This is news I can use!

I admit, the headline threw me off.  When Tom led with -- 

Trump Destroyed the Most Important Virtue in America

-- I jumped to the erroneous conclusion that since Tom is a life-long, rock-ribbed Republican and since I cannot remember a time when Republicans weren't lecturing everyone else in Christendom on the critical importance of character and personal responsibility, that Tom was definitely going to write about the virtue of people taking personal responsibility for their terrible, terrible decisions.

Like, say, the decision to spend the last several decades and billions of dollars building a political party based on pandering to the rage, racism and paranoia of bigots and imbeciles.  A decision pursued relentlessly down through the years despite clear and progressively more terrifying evidence that it would end very, very badly.

But I am not very bright, which is why, when Tom wrote this --

The collapse of seriousness is the greatest loss we have sustained under Trump, one of the least serious human beings ever to occupy a position of great power in America. What do I mean by seriousness?  It is the burden of knowing that we own our decisions, that our actions have consequences. It is the sense of responsibility that helps us to act without being ordered to act, the instinct that tells us, even when we are alone, that we owe a duty to others and that our behavior affects them as much as it does ourselves.

-- I assumed that Tom was taking a few deep breaths and flexing his knees as he prepared to dive deeply into the long, long history of Republican lies, failures, vandalism, sedition, slander and sabotage that led, at last, to Tom's party nominating and then electing the worst human being ever to occupy the Oval Office in 2016, and then, after four years of unrelenting madness, racism, treason and disaster, marching back to the polls in even greater numbers to try to re-elect him.  

But I was wrong.  As I said, I'm not very bright.  In fact, the word "Republican" does not appear anywhere in Tom's article in The Atlantic at all -- an article which (he said checking back with the vox populi) is now being compared favorably to the time Thomas Paine was a guest on The Ingraham Angle.  

Instead Tom taught me that Both Sides have had flirtations with "unseriousness" in the past:

Liberals will locate the start of the unserious presidency with the election of Ronald Reagan ... Conservatives think it began with Bill Clinton and his sax-playing, skirt-chasing, little-boy lip-biting.

Also I now understand that Donald Trump was not "elected" by "Republicans".  Instead, Trump just sorta happened.  Tom is apparently not sure exactly how.  What he is sure of is that, under Trump, this group of people Tom identifies as "America" suddenly became a mob whiny, entitled...well, let's let Tom tell it:

It should not, of course, have been a shock that America under Trump became a collection of overgrown adolescents who were incapable of facing adversity. When the time came for genuine seriousness—literally, a matter of life and death—America was a nation of spoiled children, sullen when corrected, explosive with rage when forced to do anything they found unpleasant, ready to lecture others on why the Constitution gave them the right to wear a surgical mask on their chin. 

Good god, this group called "America" sounds fucking awful.  But wait!  There's more!  

This level of entitlement and the toddlerlike understanding of “freedom” to mean “I can do anything I want without consequences” came to a head in the January 6 attack on the Capitol. One of the most serious challenges to constitutional order in the history of the United States was led by a group of the least serious citizens among us.

Wowsers!  "Unserious citizens" are just the worst!  How I wish there were some way to identify them from a safe distance  Like, say, by their political affiliation.  Sadly, the only clue Tom can offer his readers is that the worst of the worst were "Trump cultist", but even that's not going to be enough to help us navigate the world safely because there are equally terrible "unserious citizens" on Both Sides! 

Unseriousness is not limited to Trump cultists, although they seem to have embraced it most fully. It is, like COVID-19, a national affliction. Last summer, America experienced genuine and justified rage against racism and police brutality. These protests were, at first, the embodiment of seriousness, an acknowledgment that one person’s pain affects us all. However, they were later hijacked by those who wanted to play camp-out in the middle of major cities and who looted and engaged in mindless vandalism.

Of course, being the idiot that I am, before Tom set me straight, I had believed the many serious professionals who have pointed out that drawing comparisons between the organized and officially-sanction insurrection of 01/06/21 and the very few cases where BLM protests have turned violet was the worst kind of arrant Both Siderist bullshit.  But then, when I learned that Tom's opinion had been validated by none other than well-known Serious Person Matt Gaetz --

“You can moan and groan, but he was far more explicit about his calls for peace than some of the BLM and left-wing rioters were this summer when we saw violence sweep across this nation,” Republican Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida said in defending Trump before the House voted 232-197 to impeach the president for inciting an insurrection.

-- well clearly Tom has a lot to teach us all!

So, speaking of teaching, what did we all learn from my very good personal friend Tom Nichols today?  

We learned that Donald Trump came to power in some inexplicable way that had nothing to do with any political party or electoral process.

We learned that before Donald Trump came to power (in some inexplicable way that had nothing to do with any political party or electoral process) everything was just fine, so you definitely cannot blame the rise of a monster like Trump on the political activities of any specific group of people -- a group in which, if they even existed, Tom may or may not have been very active for his entire adult life. 

We learned that, in fact, America does not have political parties at all -- parties which, if they did exist, would probably have long and well-document records of believing specific things and taking specific actions for which the leaders and members of that party would obviously be personally responsible.

We learned that, instead of political parties, a group called "America" is, in some mystical way, collectively at fault for Donald Trump -- a group which, under Trump, became a passel whiny-ass titty babies.

We learned that the real problem with "America" is "unseriousness" which is equally endemic on Both Sides!

And we learned one more thing., which is the most important thing of all.

We learned that, if you're a Famous Never Trumper As Seen On Teevee, as part of your benefits package, whenever you wish you will be gifted gigs like this one: responding to explicitly Republican atrocities by troweling out exactly the same brand of cheap, craven, "voice from nowhere" Both Siderist snake oil that hacks like David Fucking Brooks have been peddling from the pages of The New York Times for nearly 20 years.

Behold, a Tip Jar!