The Angry Baby With The Light's Out Punch

Wednesday (many Wednesdays too late) John Ellis "Jeb" Bush finally decided to unleash some of those verbal fisticuffs for which the boys of Phillips Andover Academy are legendary.

“He was a Democrat longer in the last decade than he was a Republican,” Bush said. “Look, Mr. Trump has clearly got talent. . . . But when people look at his record, it is not a conservative record. Even on immigration where . . . the language is pretty vitriolic for sure, but hundreds of millions of dollars of costs to implement his plans is not a conservative plan.”

Oh Jebulon, if pretending for the last six and a half years that history began on January 20, 2009 has taught us anything it's that nobody in the GOP is interested in taking a guided tour of "the last decade", especially a tour led by some foof named Bush.

Still, good form from the old sock! Butterfly jab. Butterfly jab. Drop in the word 'vitriolic' because nothing wows the hayshakers like some upscale vocabulary. And another butterfly jab.

And then Jersey Don dropped a house on him.

Bush and Trump face off in N.H. — and The Donald is winning

DERRY, N.H. — They showed up by the hundreds. They stood in line under the hot sun for hours. They carried paper cut-outs of Donald Trump’s face. They folded into the seats of a high school auditorium here, hard rock music pulsating, and got ready to ask questions of the bombastic billionaire they hope to elect president. This was Trump’s first New Hampshire town hall meeting, and the place was crackling.

A few minutes in, a man in the crowd shouted, “Isn’t Jeb sinking to the bottom of [Lake] Winnipesaukee by now?”

“Ahh,” Trump replied, “these are my people.”

Jeb Bush wasn’t at the bottom of any lake. He was 19 miles down the road from Derry, giving a workman-like performance before a sedate crowd of about 150 at a Veterans of Foreign Wars post in Merrimack.

In this first-in-the-nation primary state, tailor-made for a center-right, business-friendly, establishment-approved candidate, Bush is caught uncomfortably between the rising forces on his right and left. He has been unable to assert himself as the alpha candidate that many Republicans expected he would be.

...

Trump has swooped in to galvanize many on the right here and nationally with his tough talk against political correctness and illegal immigration. Trump led the field in New Hampshire with 18 percent, followed by Bush at 13 percent and Kasich right behind at 12 percent, according to a recent Boston Herald/Franklin Pierce University poll of likely GOP primary voters.

Trump taunted Bush with his visit Wednesday. Only after Bush had announced his Merrimack town hall meeting did Trump schedule his for the same time in nearby Derry, inviting comparisons between their crowd sizes and performance levels.

As Trump’s capacity crowd grew restless — chanting “We want Trump!” — the candidate held court backstage for a half- hour with reporters. He slammed Bush for past comments about immigration, the Iraq war and women’s health. “I don’t see how he’s electable,” he said.

At which point some of the high rollers discretely slipped out the side door and went look for better odds at the craps game down the street:

...

Some major Bush donors quietly have reached out to the Kasich team in recent days to learn more about the Ohio governor and express interest in possibly supporting him, according to Republicans familiar with the conversations.

“Bush hasn’t done anything as a candidate, other than raise money, to indicate that he can concolidate mainstream Republicans,” said Andrew E. Smith, director of the University of New Hampshire Survey Center. “It means this is a free-for-all.”

Who knew that the self-immolation of the Party of Lincoln would be this entertaining? Sure it's a tragedy, but none of the monsters in this horror flick give a shit about me anyway, so if a volcano is going to burn down my little house no matter what I do, I'm damn well going to at least enjoy the spectacular sunsets it leaves in its wake.