Don't look

Directly into his eyes.

Well this was some creepy shit to wake up to. A "thank you" to Mike from C&L about this, but Jeez man, next time wait until after my Super Ooper Duper Pat Robertson "Morning in Jeebusland" Pick-Me-Up Smoothie.

Now with Extra Righteousness!

Here's the rest of the story that goes, in brief, like this:

"Because loons like this often get elected. Sensible, intelligent candidates are practically chased out of town with pitchforks and torches."

And speaking of tiny-brained mutants, especially ones that can lift a full ton, this via the Daily Herald...

Dwarf dinosaur? Scientists say yes

By Associated Press

Posted Wednesday, June 07, 2006

NEW YORK - Dwarf dinosaurs? It sounds like the old George Carlin joke about jumbo shrimp: two words that just don't go together.

But fossils from northern Germany have revealed a dinosaur that evolved into a dwarf, ending up only about one-third the size of its closest known relatives, scientists report.

The four-legged plant-eater was no lap dog: It measured about 20 feet from its snout to the tip of its long tail and it weighed about a ton.

But next to its close evolutionary cousin Camarasaurus, a well-known beast that stretched some 59 feet long, this guy was a runt.

What happened? The researchers say it's a case of island dwarfism, the tendency of big species to shrink over time when they find themselves on an island. It's well-known among mammals, as with fossil elephants only about 3 feet tall found in Sicily and elsewhere.
...

The creature, dubbed Europasaurus holgeri, lived 154 million years ago near what is now the German town of Goslar.

...

Cool beans! I can scarcely imagine something more rewarding than finding a new dino species.

But the name? "Europasaurus holgeri"? It doesn't sing. It doesn't dance.

Is it too late to propose "Christosaurus Robertsoni Antisolepsis"? Not only would it accurately describe a small-brained creature, mutated by isolation, that can obviously squat its own body weight of 2,000 lbs, but would also go down as the first dino to vehemently deny its own existence.

Thus bringing in the irony crowd, so important to the financial well-being of your modern natural history museums,