Thursday, October 26, 2017

The Pants Party Is Over

Based on Mark Halperin's evident lack of basic human social skills, I figure this is pretty much what his come-on's sound like. 

From CNN:
Five women accuse journalist and 'Game Change' co-author Mark Halperin of sexual harassment
And of course Action Must Be Taken!  From Variety:
Mark Halperin Suspended as NBC News Contributor Following Sexual Harassment Allegations
But here is the real question:  Is he gone for good?

I would guess not.

Because Mark Halperin has been an unforgivable shart-in-white-Dockers stain on the profession of journalism since forever.  He sucks at everything, except sucking up to Conservatives.  From me, back in 2013:
The Loud Gargling Noise You May Have Heard Earlier...

..was the sound of NBC Legitimate Journalist Mark Halperin giving Glenn Beck one the the noisiest radio blowjobs I have heard in a long time.

Highlights included Mr. Halperin explaining how "honored" he was to be on Glenn Beck's radio show  after which he spent several minutes loudly agreeing with Beck on the "obvious" Liberal bias of the media, and how he has to explain to those few, ign'rant journalists who may dispute Mr. Halperin's infinite wisdom in such matters that whether it is true or not, "over 50%" of Murrica believes the media to be the Commie Stooges of the Kenyan Usurper.  And that is the important thing.

What Mr. Halperin somehow failed to mention is that some considerable fraction of those people who will swear on the bones of their sainted Confederate ancestors and the Second Amendment that the media is in the pocket of the Kenyan Usurper, believe it so fervently because Conservative moles like Mark Halperin regularly scrape together the "legitimate media" cred they get from working at places like NBC, walk it across town, and hand it over to demagogues like Glenn Beck...
And yet, after each of Mr. Halperin's embarrassing, public desecration of his profession, NBC president Phil Griffin has always dusted him off, taken him back and given him a nice raise, or his own show, or some other substantial financial token of esteem.

So if -- if -- NBC president Phil Griffin in willing to come up with enough do-re-mi to silence Mr. Halperin's accusers, then, based on a long established media industry standard known as "The driftglass interlude" with which longtime readers are already very familiar, we can assume that Mr. Halperin's exile from the Very Serious Journalisming Club will last 30 days (from me, back in 2012)
...This time around and right on schedule, it fell to the vapid, unctuous Charlie Rose to let one of the Villager's favorite naughty clowns --

-- back out of the penalty box (h/t Harvey Chess)

I guess since David Gregory -- 
-- was tapped to retrieve the little lost lamb de jour last time -- expertly fellating disgraced Republican pervert Newt Gingrich back to Beltway Respectability at the tail end of 2010 -- it's only fair that Rose would have to be the one to lay back and do his bit for the Empire.

I also note for the record that Rose performed his duty almost exactly one month to the day after Halperin fell from grace from the Village which (for what I assume are accounting and HR reasons)   is now the standard time-out for bad little Beltway monkeys who get caught flinging the wrong brand of poo and which (were I a better writer) I might describe as "In the rank sweat of an enseamed bed/ Stew'd in corruption, honeying and making love/ Over the nasty sty...".
And why is this important?

I'm glad you asked.

So set your clocks for late November, 2017 and we'll all reconvene here to see whether or not Mr. Halperin will be insinuated back into the inner circle of the Serious Media Club...

...or whether NBC will have to thaw out another, bloodless goon to take his place and perform the vital work of staring dead-eyed into the camera, intoning "It's The Extremes On Both Sides" as the answer to every question.

Meanwhile, this seems like a good time to formally begin my annual birthday fundraiser, seeing as how not a pfennig of the millions of dollars the mainstream media throws around to hire legions of idiots like Halperin is ever gonna land in my tip jar :-)

Behold, a Tip Jar!


Pablo in the Gazebo said...

No dick, no dick, you're the dick.

Tom Shefchik said...

I believe a lot of supporters of Don "The Con" like him because he is so awful. He's like a Ricky Gervais or Jerry Lewis character: stupefyingly cringe inducing. The GOP can steal the bread, while Don provides the circus.

Tom Shefchik said...

The Never-Trumpers are just angry that Don "The Con" does conservatism too blatantly badly. He lies too frequently for them to be able to clean up with obfuscation. Even Sarah Sanders is obviously a fool. His greed, bigotry and misogyny are too obvious. They prefer a more subtle fascism.

Robt said...

Like Romney's magic underwear puppet.....

Fritz Strand said...

As Louie use to say on 'Taxi', hey Halperin, 'Heh, heh, heh'.

Jason said...

When I first heard about the Mark Halperin harassment allegations my first thought was, "Driftglass is going to have a field day of schaudenfreudian glee about this". Then reading your post I forgot about your awareness of "It's a club and you ain't in it". Halperin might just get a hand slap and shuffled back on stage soon but this one feels different. Maybe it's the climate but sexual harassment seems to be sticking (to everyone but Trump go figure). Here's to Mark Halperin kicked out of the club to slum around in right wing reddit posts ('cause you just KNOW he ain't landing on the left side of the spectrum) for the rest of his miserable days.

trgahan said...

@ Jason

My money is that the difference you're feeling is Media realizing the pig people don't care who lies to them, as long as they can see and hear the lies where and when they want them.

And outside the studio stage door is a long line of people with communication degrees waving pre-signed none disclosure agreements willing to be right wing propaganda readers in exchange of the overnight wealth and status.