Thursday, March 02, 2017

Crooked Republican U.S. Attorneys General Sure Do Have Shitty Memories

Here is Bush family fixer and disgrace to his profession. Alberto Gonzales, almost exactly ten years ago, conducting an advanced class in "I Don't Recall".

Ten years later, Russian sock-puppet and disgrace to his country, Jefferson* Beauregard Sessions takes up Gonzales' mantle:

Steve Martin should be charging them a hefty fee for using his bit:

And it just gets worse and worse.  From The New York Times:
Kushner and Flynn Met With Russian Envoy in December, White House Says


MARCH 2, 2017

WASHINGTON — Michael T. Flynn, then Donald J. Trump’s incoming national security adviser, had a previously undisclosed meeting with the Russian ambassador in December to “establish a line of communication” between the new administration and the Russian government, the White House said on Thursday.

Jared Kushner, Mr. Trump’s son-in-law and now a senior adviser, also participated in the meeting at Trump Tower with Mr. Flynn and Sergey I. Kislyak, the Russian ambassador. But among Mr. Trump’s inner circle, it is Mr. Flynn who appears to have been the main interlocutor with the Russian envoy — the two were in contact during the campaign and the transition, Mr. Kislyak and current and former American officials have said.

But the extent and frequency of their contacts remains unclear, and the disclosure of the meeting at Trump Tower adds to the emerging picture of how the relationship between Mr. Trump’s incoming team and Moscow was evolving to include some of the president-elect’s most trusted advisers...
 They're all dirty.

*Thanks for the catch


bowtiejack said...

Yeah, I'm getting a sense that this is going to make Watergate look like bodega shoplifting.
Will people do really, really, REALLY stupid things if they think enough money is involved?

trgahan said...

I still have doubts much will come of Trump's Russian Ties on a legal level, but I hope we're watching Session's dream of turning the Department of Justice into an Alabama sheriff's office ca. 1961 burn down right in front of him.

At the very least, like DeVos, Sessions likely just pissed away his political capital and factions in Justice that don't like him now have some power to either ignore him or tell him to piss off.

Lawrence said...

It really is the "What woman?" bit from that Walter Mathau movie.

jim said...

This episode of "The Rise & Fall of The Dunning-Kruger Doctrine: Don't Blink or You'll Miss It" seems pretty hackneyed & retro.

Waiting for Sweeps Week - & the inevitable last episode cliffhanger.

rattlemullet said...

It started with Ed Meese in 1987 when he used the phrase over three hundred times in deposition.

Hubert Vale said...

Trumpy forgot the 2 simple words and said "I'm smart" when asked why he didn't pay his taxes. 🤣

Dave McCarthy said...

TOTAL surprise to see Alberto Gonzales on my liberal TeeVee this a.m. He said, and I know this will shock you all, that it's WAY too early to know if an independent investigation is called for, AND that OF COURSE Jefferson Beauregard's deputy will be impartial.

Fritz Strand said...

Sessions even lied when asked by Franken if he had ever played the banjo with the Russkis.

Richard Luken said...

Actually, rattlemullet, it goes back further than Ed Meese, to the Grandfather of Them All, the first employer of the "Southern Strategy."

When I saw driftglass' inclusion of Steve Martin's “I forgot” routine, I thought that Don Novello's turn as Father Guido Sarducci was actually closer to the mark, but he acknowledges that the idea was not his own when, back in 1980, he marveled at the brilliance of the “I don't recall” clause.

Don Novello as Fr. Guido Sarducci:

starts at 7:04 mark

“I make some money from this book I wrote. You know, little royalties kinda dribble in here and there. It's for sale all over Europe in the back of churches, at shrines and that. It's called Father Guido Sarducci's Guide to the Confessional. It's coming out now, an American edition in English. I hope you can keep an eye out for it. It's going to be in book stores, I hope, everywhere. You know, every year in this country Americans have to pay their income tax. And paying your income tax in America, it's kinda like going to confession to the government. You have to tell them how much money you made, where you made it, where you spent it, all that stuff. And people with a lot of money, they get lawyers. They get accountants. And those lawyers and accountants, they weasel and maneuverer their way around the law, and they get their clients off pretty easy. Well, it's the same in the Church. And with my book your going to be able to weasel and maneuver your way around sin. You can screw around your whole life and still get to heaven. Eternal happiness, $4.95, who can beat that? I'll go over some of the chapters for you , just to give you a little taste of what's in here. There's this one chapter I think it's just wonderful. It's entitled: “All you should know about the 'I don't recall' clause.” I got that idea from one of your former Presidents. It was just brilliant, you know, when you think of it! If you say: “I don't recall,” I mean, what can anybody say, right? “I don't recall!” “I don't recall!”

ends at 8:57

As noted, the relevant section begins at the 7:04 mark; however, as the earlier part of the performance includes his famous “five minute university” routine, it is worth a listen from the beginning.

Anyone whose powers of recollection are as bad as those exhibited on Thursday by Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions III lacks the intellectual capacity necessary to serve as a paralegal to an Assistant US Attorney.

And a h/t to Charles P. Pierce, who included in his post a link to this site:

It features Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions III's thoughts on what should be done to people who perjure themselves. Of course, his own case is "different."