Friday, May 16, 2014

Operation Murrican Spring

They're opposed to all the tyranny and such.

Unfortunately today's Rally to Overthrow the Kenyan Usurper Because Chemtrails and Freedumb failed to attract the requisite millions of armed idiots needed to pull off their righteous coup.  Some blamed the a conflicting Matlock marathon on TBS, while others cited the suspicious lack of ample Port-O-Lets (Damn you, Park Service fascists!) and the stiff 7 mph headwind which made it virtually impossible for many of the armed patriots' Medicare-provided HoverRound scooters to make it across the Mall (damn you Obamacare!)

From the Moonie Times:
Operation American Spring falls flat: ‘This is very disappointing,’ Texan says.

Operation American Spring, billed as a Friday morning multi-million patriot march on Washington, D.C., to oust leadership from the nation’s capital — from President Obama to House Speaker John Boeher — has proven woefully below expectations.

“It’s a very dismal turnout,” said Jackie Milton, 61, a Jacksboro, Texas, resident and the head of Texans for Operation American Spring, to The Washington Times. He said hopes were high when he arrived in Alexandria, Va., a day or so ago and found motels and hotels were sold out for 30 miles around.

But weather’s dampened turnout a bit, he said.

“We were getting over two inches of rain in hour in parts of Virginia this morning,” Mr. Milton said. “Now it’s a nice sunny day. But this is a very poor turnout. It ain’t no millions. And it ain’t looking like there’s going to be millions. Hundreds is more like it.”

Operation American Spring was billed as far back as six months ago as a rally call for patriotic Americans to force leaders in Washington, D.C., to return to a more limited and constitutional style of governance — and to oust those leaders who weren’t listening. Among the group’s targets: Mr. Obama and Mr. Boehner, as well as Attorney General Eric Holder, Sen. Majority Leader Harry Reid, Sen. Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, vice president Joe Biden and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi.
Silly Spring Chickens! Everyone knows that to get a Conservative "grass roots" movement off the ground you need a minimum investment of sixty to eighty million Koch Industry dollars, along with  a few million more in free Fox News and Hate Radio promotion.


fred said...

And don't forget about the brightly painted buses. Lots of brightly painted buses that stop at all rest stops, Ho Jos and IHOPs.

Anonymous said...

Yeah well, welcome to DC fuckers. Remember, the METRO doors will close on you, and we will push old women who stand on the wrong side of the escalators. When your fat hick of a husband looks at us mad you'll get a nice "fucking tourists" and a lot of mumbling about what sort of inbred morons don't know how to stand or walk on an escalator.

P.S. The weather is always like this, DC is a swamp you cousin fuckers. Don't like the rain, don't bother.

P.P.S. The hotels are always sold out because it's Washington DC, not some shit hole in flyover. As such people come here all the time to do things. There are real things to do here, real jobs, and real people.

tmk said...

Oh, look, it's Geese!

Fuck off, Geese. I hope ya get run over by a crotchety old fuck on a Rascal, even though that's better than you deserve.

gratuitous said...

For those nagged by the question whether it's sporting or nice to inflict malicious, cruel and unrelenting ridicule on these, our fellow citizens, my answer is:


This has been a public service of your friendly neighborhood gratuitous

crweaver said...

Nice to know that a Right Sector-like putsch attempt fizzled out - at least for now.

bruce.desertrat said...

"He said hopes were high when he arrived in Alexandria, Va., a day or so ago and found motels and hotels were sold out for 30 miles around"

Garsh golleee jee willikers pa! It might even be Gradiation week from alla them commie-yoo-nest univeritees and colleges o book larnin'

[Red Forman] Dumbass![/RF]

Monster from the Id said...

Geese, or whoever you are:

I am one of the flown-over hicks, and I agree that your point--which you make by pretending to believe the opposite--is legitimate.

However, even I think your shtick is getting older than King Tut's mummy case.


Meanwhile, no one needs to worry about the putscher-wannabes.

The Smart Faction of the Malefactors Of Great Wealth, which uses the Dinocratic Party as its primary vehicle these days, understands that it needs a strong Federal Govt. to suppress rebellions against capitalism at home and abroad, so that "damn Gummint" will endure.

Ironically, the D-Party faithful, just like the Crazy Uncles and Aunts Liberty who detest the D-Party, honestly believe that the D-Party is the enemy of capitalism, or at least a check on its greater outrages--rather than the vehicle of the shrewder, more effective faction of the capitalists.

The Reptilian Party, of course, is the primary vehicle of the USA's equivalents of Monty Python's Upper Class Twits, though Crazy Uncle & Aunt Liberty think it's the vehicle of Everyday Real Murkans.

kmhauser said...

A gathering of the iliteratti.

J R in WV said...

Not to mention High School students going to DC to learn about the founding fathers, and republican forms of government, and like that! And conventions, and national organization meetings of real organizations, with by-laws, and scheduled meetings, and officers and budgets and all like that there.

Anonymous said...

Someone said estimates went from 10 million people to 10 millin' people. Guess they were right.

Mister Roboto said...

Well, then I guess those particular teatards know how I felt being a young radical leftist going to demonstrations in Madison in the late nineteen-eighties.

Back then, an older gay man who had been around the block a few times, told me that as I got older, I would realize that one can't save the world, because the world doesn't want to be saved. I wish I had been of a mind to listen to him.

Grung_e_Gene said...

The Thin White Line o' Heroes when the DroneZ begin to Roll!

Unsalted Sinner said...

This can't be true, 'cause I dropped by their website just now and everyone were really optimistic over there -- no mention of poor turnout, and pictures of Sarah Palin arriving and everything! (Though that may have been from 2009 or something.)

You're clearly just shilling for Obummer, Driftglass! The Revolution Is ON!!!1!