Thursday, August 22, 2013

On The Occasion of Internet Quitter Tbogg's

imminent derparture (not a typo so just stop) from this vale of tears, here is some stuff he wrote back when OFA agents from the future first stole his brain and replaced it with an unkillable liquid metal future-brain.

From the future!
Your Mumia sweatshirt won’t get you into heaven anymore
A comment left over at digg regarding Ralph Nader:
The Democrats really hate Nader because he points out the fact that they are asking those of us on the left to vote for them but they aren’t doing anything for us. Did they end funding for the Republican’s crime spree in Iraq? No. Have they moved for UHC? No. Have they tried to stop corporate crimes? No. Have they tried to reform the tax code to be progressive? No. Have they tried to protect homeowners from predatory lenders? No. Have they defended our constitutional rights? No. Take back the FDA from the corporations? No. The FCC? No.
The Democrats don’t deserve my vote. They aren’t helping the left, why should the left help them?
Let me see if I can explain it this way: 
Every year in Happy Gumdrop Fairy-Tale Land all of the sprites and elves and woodland creatures gather together to pick the Rainbow Sunshine Queen. Everyone is there: the Lollipop Guild, the Star-Twinkle Toddlers, the Sparkly Unicorns, the Cookie Baking Apple-cheeked Grandmothers, the Fluffy Bunny Bund, the Rumbly-Tumbly Pupperoos, the Snowflake Princesses, the Baby Duckies All-In-A-Row, the Laughing Babies, and the Dykes on Bikes. They have a big picnic with cupcakes and gumdrops and pudding pops, stopping only to cast their votes by throwing Magic Wishing Rocks into the Well of Laughter, Comity, and Good Intentions. Afterward they spend the rest of the night dancing and singing and waving glow sticks until dawn when they tumble sleepy-eyed into beds made of the purest and whitest goose down where they dream of angels and clouds of spun sugar. 
You don’t live there. 
Grow the fuck up.
This is from February 2008, for anyone who thought the Purity Patrol was a modern contraption.

More "Best Of" here.


Lumpy Lang said...

" for anyone who thought the Purity Patrol was a modern contraption."

No. It's a lie spun out of whole cloth for the sole purpose of pimping the Democratic wing of the Property Party. Droneglass' specialty.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

That was awesome, Lumpy. Proving DG's point in a comment supposedly arguing against that point.

Seriously, it was like performance art. 1 point off for calling him a name. though. It detracts from the hilarious purity.

Yastreblyansky said...

That was wonderfully crisp, ZRM. Though in my view the name-calling is obligatory, like the flaw in a Japanese painting.

Jack said...

L. Lang: Just curious. Have you ever voted for one of the two parties?

I'll tell you my history: Long time Noam Chomsky admirer and fan.* In 1992, I wanted Jerry Brown to get the Democratic nod, but ultimately did vote for Clinton -- who was about my last choice in the field that year.

By 1996, I was in full blown purity troll mode: A lifelong resident of Michigan, I felt betrayed by NAFTA. So I voted for Nader. But it was an easy choice: I knew Clinton had Michigan in the bag. My vote was a symbolic protest against a too-centrist Democratic Party.

In 2000, I was a lot less certain who would win Michigan, so I voted for Gore.

By this time, I was in my 30's, and had "grown the fuck up" (to paraphrase Tbogg). I now understand the brutal truth: We have a two party system and our only practical options are to work within it. Especially after seeing the catastrophic result of the Bush presidency - a direct result of Nader voters denying Gore the state of Florida - I have never considered voting 3rd party since.

It's not that the people here can't comprehend your purity troll instincts. It's that we're a lot more sober, serious, and practical than you are.

*Chomsky, who says, correctly, that Democrats and Republicans are two wings of the same party -- the business party. But who also said there are significant differences between the two wings on many important issues, and who voted for Obama out of a recognition that bad is better than worse, frying pan is better than fire, 50% is better than nothing. The real clowns in US politics are those who insist, as you appear to, that the two parties are exactly the same, equally bad, etc. They're not. And I think at some level you know that.

Lumpy Lang said...

'Good cop'/'bad cop' aren't the same, but both serve the same system.

Droneglass' tiresome reiterations of the Purity Troll meme is the classic 'tell' - revealing the underlying bad faith of the Libs' shamefaced and abject loyalty to the police state no matter how criminal its actions become.

Hence their uniquely vitriolic hatred of any and all who would dare pierce the veil of 'official secrecy' (not least for exposing the feet of clay at which they grovel.)

jim said...

Reading Tacitus' "Annals" right now, & oh lord, saying the Purity Patrol isn't a recent innovation is putting it VERY mildly.

You can figure out the context & wake up ahead of time, which gives you breathing room & utility to improve said context - or you can reap the ego-onanistic benefits of playing White Knight Of Eternal Purity until you get forced to wake up the hard way during the main event, when nothing can be done any more to make anything better ... & there is no option "C" that works. Choose wisely.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I have to say that there just aren't enough opportunities these days to use the word "Contraption".

tony in san diego said...

"uniquely vitriolic hatred"
See, there is your tell. That last little hyperbolic sting you can't resist.

Long time reader here, and I have never seen uniquely vitriolic hatred except in the comment section.

Anonymous said...

Parroting Iraq War supporters: Saddam is worse than any illegal war which kills millions of innocent Iraqis.
Grow up!

Smartpatrol said...

Gore ran a craptacular, stepped-on dick of Rube-Goldberg campaign that makes Hilliary's 2008 primary clusterfuck look like a swiss watch by comparison. Despite this, he won the election, refused to call Bush/Fox bluff when they stole the election, and then buried himself with his own gavel when the congressional black caucus tried to get the whole thing investigated. Blaming Nader for what you don't do, didn't do and for what you refuse to do is textbook chickenshit DLC behaviour, an gives Gore a free pass for being to lazy to fight for the election he won.

Cirze said...

I still admire that last comment.

Gives us all pause who've thought this ever since.

If lazy = connected.