Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Stupid Shit David Brooks Says

 

Who is standing in the way of sensible gun-control legislation?

Graduates of my world-famous "How to Write a David Brooks Column" self-actualization seminar ("10 Easy Steps to Punditting Like a Pro!") -- 
1) Pick a subject. Any subject. From Tasseled Loafers to Torture, it literally does not matter.

2) Quote extensively from one person or group on the subject. It's OK to just more-or-less copy and paste in big hunks of what whatever-you-happen-to-be-reading-at-the-moment to flesh out your 800-word column. Here at the Times we call that "research"!

3) Quote from some other person or group on the same subject who appears to hold a different opinion. If no actual opposition exists, just put on your Magic Green Jacket and invent an opposing opinion.

4) Although such is not the case with today's subject, as often as possible, try to impute these fictional distinctions to the different hemispheres of the political Universe. So no matter how bigoted, reckless or just bugfuck crazy the Right behaves, you just go right ahead and blandly assert with no supporting evidence whatsoever that the Left is equally and oppositely bad in exactly the same qualities and quantities. Here at the Times we call that "seriousness"!

5) Discover in your final paragraph or two that -- amazingly! -- the precise midpoint between those two completely artificial positions on an imaginary spectrum just happens to be exactly the Right and Reasonable answer!
-- understand the answer to any such question is absolutely foreordained.

For the uninitiated, well, let's permit America's Greatest Conservative Public Intellectual speak for himself (emphasis added):
...Let me say that I generally support gun control legislation, because I think the downsides are so minimal. But I have to say I’ve really been put off by the over-the-top self-righteousness of gun control supporters over the past several days. They act like the case for gun control is open and shut, and that anybody who is skeptical has blood on their hands. 
...All this is not to say that gun control laws are definitely ineffective. ... Still, there is not enough evidence here to justify all the simple-minded self-righteousness.

...The basic truth is that most policies fail and even those that work rarely produce results robust enough to be an open-and-shut case. When we are making policy, we’re inevitably dealing with marginal improvements and large uncertainties. There is very rarely grounds for absolutist self-righteousness. Nonetheless, there is self-righteousness in abundance.

...This isn’t only an argument about politeness. The self-righteousness on both sides of the gun issue has totally ruined the prospects for good policy making. The gun control debate is no longer about guns. It’s a culture war between urbanites and rural people.

...The N.R.A. wouldn’t be so powerful if it didn’t have the support of the majority of Americans, who probably don’t object to things like the assault weapons ban per se, but do object to urban snobbery.

...people who support the gun lobby don’t even seem to regard guns as guns. They seem to regard them as religious icons.

I’m anti-N.R.A...
...But I’m also anti the people who are anti-N.R.A.

The gun lobby is terrible. The self-righteousness lobby is offensive.
-- David Brooks, July 25 2012, "What We Talk About When We Talk About Guns"
Brave talk, made especially hilarious coming from a man who has built an entire career out of being indignantly, simple-mindedly and self-righteously wrong about everything.

13 comments:

tmk said...

...Offtopic, but you might want to go through the blogroll and check - for example: Fighting Liberals is now a resveratrol-huckstering site...

blackdaug said...

I don't recall exactly what year it was, but someone was in the process of beating the current president about the head and shoulders for a vote he cast as a state senator, that would have,in some way marginally restricted access to handguns in the greater Chicago area. I believe the bill in question went down in flames...but it was being used as an example of how the usurper would be soon directing U.N. troops to disarm the citizenry...or some such shit..
The same day that I read that story, there was another on the nightly news reporting 63? deaths by handgun...of teenagers!.... in Chicago... in the first 6 months... of that one year!
Would those be the "urbanites" DFB thinks are at war with the "rural" folk? Probably not. Unless he thinks being dead and self righteous are the same thing...which he may.
I would bet the "self righteous" group he is referring to, are the two people he has some fleeting contact with, that he considers to be... liberals. In fact, I would bet that those same two or maybe even three people, are the basis for every single turgid paragraph he pumps out about the hated left.
I wish one or all of them would figure it out, and spend an afternoon thumping the crap out of him...

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

But I have to say I’ve really been put off by the over-the-top self-righteousness of gun control supporters over the past several days.

Of course you are, you delicate flower, you.

- Sparky the Wonder Penguin
~

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I would guess his problem with the 'self-righteousness lobby' is that he feels they are poaching his turf.

Anonymous said...

Is "urban snobbery" the new "uppity nigger"?

also:

"I’m anti-N.R.A...
...But I’m also anti the people who are anti-N.R.A."

David Brooks is extremely anti-David Brooks.

Lit3Bolt said...

The War Against Self-Righteousness aka The War Against People Who Are Often Right aka The War Against The Dirty Fucking Hippies continues, because the only thing worse than someone firing guns randomly in a crowd is someone talking about gun policy in an uncivil and ungentlemanly manner.

Lit3Bolt said...

"The basic truth is that most policies fail and even those that work rarely produce results robust enough to be an open-and-shut case."

Therefore, all policy should cease immediately.

David Brooks is a Knight of the Status Quo. Hell, he's Grand Master of the order. Democrats are uppity, therefore I understand the NRA's position completely! Both sides do it, therefore nothing should be done! Whoopie!

Libs want reasonable gun control, therefore all Libs are Seventh Level Elder Snob Demons who ruin everything with their snobbery-snobbity-snob-snobbishness about not wanting people to die in random shootings, therefore the NRA is powerful because libs have a snobby attitude.


Look, I just wrote a David Brooks column. My millions await me!

Anonymous said...

"Urban snobbery," eh?

I'm amazed (but not surprised) that D. Brooks thinks it's "urban snobbery" to question the need for civilians to own military-style assault weapons, high-capacity magazines, S.W.A.T. team- style body armor and helmets, etc.

I wonder if Dave would be wiling to say that to some of the survivors of the Aurora shooting--and if he'd say that to their faces.

runst said...

"The N.R.A. wouldn’t be so powerful if it didn’t have the support of the majority of Americans, who probably don’t object to things like the assault weapons ban per se, but do object to urban snobbery."

Uhm.. Doesn't the majority of Americans live in urban areas? But I guess they aren't Real Americans.

Suzan said...

Anonymous @ 3:40 PM,

I'd like to know if DFB would say that to his neighbors in upper snobbovia.

Who are beginning to realize their defensive need for high-powered weapons.

S

I'm amazed (but not surprised) that D. Brooks thinks it's "urban snobbery" to question the need for civilians to own military-style assault weapons, high-capacity magazines, S.W.A.T. team- style body armor and helmets, etc.

I wonder if Dave would be wiling to say that to some of the survivors of the Aurora shooting--and if he'd say that to their faces.

chrome agnomen said...

could there be a more irresponsible piece of work than this? insupportable nonsense. what i 'talk about when i talk about guns', is how dick cheney shot the wrong guy.

n1ck said...

The answer to our problems is Guillotines.

Unfortunate, but true.

Professor Fate said...

Dear David
You do have blood on you hands. For this piece of dreck you wrote, for your craven defense of Penn State and of course for your cheerleading for the Iraq war. we are sorry that your piece of mind has been disrupted by people pointing this our.
"if my tone is offenseive sir you make take that I am offened" - Sherlock Holmes in Murder by Decree.