How Well I Remember

The last time a Texas Village Idiot lost debating points...

...to a technocrat from Massachusetts.



Here's how the late Hunter Thomson scored that last fight, between John Kerry and George W. Bush, who Hunter described at the time as "...a natural-born loser with a filthy-rich daddy who pimped his son out to rich oil-mongers."

Ugly, Tasteless, Terrifying and Wild... Count Me In!
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Presidential politics is a vicious business, even for rich white men, and anybody who gets into it should be prepared to grapple with the meanest of the mean. The White House has never been seized by timid warriors. There are no rules, and the roadside is littered with wreckage. That is why they call it the passing lane. Just ask any candidate who ever ran against George Bush - Al Gore, Ann Richards, John McCain - all of them ambushed and vanquished by lies and dirty tricks. And all of them still whining about it.

That is why George W Bush is President of the United States, and Al Gore is not. Bush simply wanted it more, and he was willing to demolish anything that got in his way, including the US Supreme Court. It is not by accident that the Bush White House (read: Dick Cheney & Halliburton Inc) controls all three branches of our federal government today. They are powerful thugs who would far rather die than lose the election in November.
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Republicans have never approved of democracy, and they never will. It goes back to pre-industrial America, when only white male property owners could vote.
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Kerry came into October as a five-point underdog with almost no chance of winning three out of three rigged confrontations with a treacherous little freak like George Bush. But the debates are over now, and the victor was John Kerry every time. He steamrollered Bush and left him for roadkill.

Did you see Bush on TV, trying to debate? Jesus, he talked like a donkey with no brains at all. The tide turned early, in Coral Gables, when Bush went belly up less than halfway through his first bout with Kerry, who hammered poor George into jelly. It was pitiful... I almost felt sorry for him, until I heard someone call him "Mister President", and then I felt ashamed.
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This year's first presidential debate was such a disaster for George Bush that his handlers had to be crazy to let him get in the ring with John Kerry again. Yet Karl Rove let it happen, and we can only wonder why. But there is no doubt that the president has lost his nerve, and his career in the White House is finished. No mas.
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I look at elections with the cool and dispassionate gaze of a professional gambler, especially when I'm betting real money on the outcome. Contrary to most conventional wisdom, I see Kerry with five points as a recommended risk. Kerry will win this election, if it happens, by a bigger margin than Bush finally gouged out of Florida in 2000. That was about 46 per cent, plus five points for owning the US Supreme Court - which seemed to equal 51 per cent. Nobody really believed that, but George W Bush moved into the White House anyway.
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Damn I miss that voice.

See, there are a lot of other players on the field scattering light and commentary in all directions, but that just noise.

Like Bachmann in Iowa, Herman Cain's win in Florida might mean something if early votes in places like Iowa and Florda meant anything.

But they don't.

Which is why within 48 hours of winning Iowa, Bachmann was summarily remaindered to the used crackpot dollar-off bin, and the race was forcibly redefined by Rick Perry's press agents and Our Imperial Media into a two-man contest between the hated Mitt Romney, and a guy who had campaigned nowhere, won no preliminary contests and had only deigned to announce his intentions 11 minutes before.

Because the Village decides who the front-runners are, which battlefields matter and who "wins" the televised bear-baiting contests they insist on calling "debates" for some reason.

So let "No Labels" grifter and Republican spear-carrier Mark McKinnon use his backstage pass to "The Daily Beast" to write about how awesomely prepared George Bush was...in 2000... or how two roads diverging in the wilderness made all the difference, or whatever else he wants to piddle on about.

I will use my backstage pass to my little pie shop on the far edge of town to point out that, other than Bartlet v. Ritchie

the idea that being a shallow slab of well-coiffed Confederate dumbfuck is somehow a disqualifier for the office of President -- that majority of "the Murrica people" (much less the cretins still clinging to the bottom of the cultural crasker barrel in the GOP) have suddenly gotten hip to the fact that [arrogant + stupid = disaster] -- is absurd.

Not if arrogant-stupid has enough clout with the elite media to get them to do his fighting for him.

Not if arrogant-stupid waves a big enough Bible and a big enough Flag..

Not if arrogant-stupid screams "Socialist!" loud enough.

And absolutely not if arrogant-stupid has enough money behind him him to lift a three million ton bronze graven image of "Saint Ronald Reagan Freeing the Slaves" into High Earth Orbit.