A dog-eared, tenth generation photocopy of every other Mouse Circus.
On “Fox News Sunday” the preternaturally tidy Republican Charlie “Charlie Crist” Crist battled it out with Republican Vampire Diaries Heartthrob Marco Rubio over which of them would get to cast the Sunshine State’s symbolic Republican “No” vote on everything President Obama proposes for the next six years.
Michele Bachmann was supposed to be doing her thing on “Face the Nation” .
I could not attest to it myself, as I have already seen that movie before
and had no desire to see it again.
On “Meet the Press” Lindsey Graham tried to simultaneously pitch a fit and call for the Evil Democrats to stop being mean and work with the Imaginary Reasonable Wing of the GOP.
Sorta like tap dancing when you’re chin-deep in cow shit: your technique might be excellent and your exertions might be real buy, y'know, you’re chin-deep in cow shit, so who could possibly tell or care?
On “This Week”
Terry Moran watched Obama Senior Adviser, Valerie Jarrett, recite laundry lists of talking points in an almost perfectly flat monotone.
Later, Peggington Noonington bitched that Republican ideas were not welcome at the Big Commie Takeover Party.
Which I guess is why they had to tie them to bricks and heave them through windows.
Paul Krugman wondered aloud what planet she lives on.
George Will whined about the rejection of fictional bills that never would have passed in a million years and how much better and bipartisan-y that would have been.
In other words, Loser Talk.
Finally, Peggington Noonington moans that nobody pays enough attention to the Great Center: that Big Bunch in the Middle that never pays attention to Politics, or Media, or What Country They’re Living In, or Geography, or any Recent History that doesn’t involve the word “Kardashian”.
Because FCC Title 47, Part 22, Section B, Subsection 112.2 clearly states that somebody has to.
On ”The Chris Matthews Show”
Health Care passed because the ghost of Ted Kennedy animated a Neil Simon play.
Or something.
Andrew Sullivan noted with great alarm that there is no Conservative Establishment anymore to keep the Christopaths and the Klansmen locked in the basement, and that Fox News is now the GOP.
In other words, what Liberals have been saying since the 1960s (from me, here):
From Rod Serling writing in an editorial in the (then very right-wing) Los Angeles Times in 1964, in response to a series of articles by wingnut-apologist Morrie Ryskind:…
What Mr. Ryskind seems constitutionally unable to understand is that there is a vast difference between the criticism of a man or a party, and the setting up of criteria or patriotism which equates differences of opinion with disloyalty.
We have need in the country for an enlightened, watchful and articulate opposition. We have no need for semi-secret societies who are absolutist, dictatorial, and would substitute for a rule of law and reason an indiscriminate assault on the institutions of this republic that should and must be held sacrosanct.
…
“[The far right cannot] discount the fact that sitting it their parlor is the Ku Klux Klan, the American Nazi Party, every racist group in the United States and not a few of some Fascist orders that have scrambled their way up from the sewers to a position of new respectability.”
The Right has been getting away with playing Gingrich chicken -- dressing up what are basically wonkish policy differences in the threads of Revelation and Armageddon -- for far too long now to know how to rule any other way.
They are now -- as they were amply and repeatedly warned by Liberals would happen -- entirely hostage to a breed of crazies of their own making; locked into the Branch Reaganian ompound with lunatics who rant night and day about Fire, Purity and the End Times while their minions soak every surface in kerosene, and stuff every pillow with napalm.
I for one have given up trying to talk these hate junkies out of the furnace even as they call people like me "Traitor!" and bite the hand we extend to them over and over again.
Instead, I've got me a bag of marshmallows.
A looooong stick.
And a copy of "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" to read in the firelight.
In Part Two, This Week in Brooks...
3 comments:
Terrific breakdown as usual.
What I thought you were gonna say here was "tried to simultaneously pitch a fit while screaming for the other side to stop pitching a fit."
You triumphed over my banal imagining, and have wrapped up the Sunday Morning Snooze brilliantly.
Thank Gaaaahhhh we don't have to watch.
Kudos!
On “Meet the Press” Lindsey Graham tried to simultaneously pitch a fit and call for the Evil Democrats to stop being mean and work with the Imaginary Reasonable Wing of the GOP.
Serling.
Sigh.
Thanks again.
S
"Peggington Noonington moans that nobody pays enough attention to the Great Center"
Scientists tell us that no matter what planet you're on, it will appear to you that you are at the center of the universe. From where I sit, it's clear that Noonington is on another planet.
I prefer "What rat-infested sewer do you live in? What? The rats all fled when you arrived? Welp, I guess they were scared they'd catch some awful disease."
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