Saturday, May 28, 2005

Then Satan skull-fucked me…



…and his Jimmy-stick was this big.

How else to explain so many wormy ideas packed inside this dolt’s pointy head?

William Pryor: Unfit to Serve. Part I.

Rising like another Hero of Intolerance from the Imbecile Christian People’s Republic of Alabama and combining the least appetizing aspects of Cardinal Riecheleau and Cotton Mather...comes William H. Pryor, Jr.: the Bush recess appointment to the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals.

Pryor was anointed to the court by Dear Leader during one of those smuggled-in-in-the-middle-of-the-night-judge-and-beer-runs but he still needs to be confirmed by the Senate, which makes him one of the “Gang of Ten”. The ten nominees that are so bugfuck Ultra Right wing that the GOP could not ram through the first time. In toto, they got 96% of their people through. 96%...and they are whining and sniveling about how unfair it all is. How the Evil Liberal Media is beating up “people of faith.”

Look! Look! See the injustice of it all. Look at my wounds. See my righteous stigmata!

So as a brief Public Service aside, lets deconstruct that filthy “people of faith” tripe before continuing:

For this argument to be true – that the Vast Liberal Cabal is waging war against the devout --must mean that all the other nominees were atheists, right? Or Wiccans? Or Animists? Because all of the rest of them made it right past the Siege Guns of the Ungodly Liberals without a quibble.

And only these ten are “people of faith”, which is why there’s such a ruckus. So either 96% of Bushes nominees were actually and shockingly inimical to Christianity, which the fucknut Shining Path Republicans insist is the Number One Priority among Liberals, and which one would have assumed the fucknut Shining Path Republicans would have opposed with that same unblinking Cerberus-like rabid vigor they bring to every other fight…

….or the rest of Bushes nominees were just as devout as anyone else, in which case the fucknut Shining Path Republicans are just as big a bunch of lying douchebags as we always thought the were.

This kind of reasoning and these kind of people are what you get when you squeegee out Beelzebub’s athletic supporter and centrifuge out the solids. And wouldn’t it be just fucking peachy if someone in the MSM would actually pay attention and notice and maybe report on little contradictions like this?

End of Public Service Message.

So this honey-bucket full of Dobson/Robertson/Falwell marionettes run the courts, the press, the government and the corporate structure of the richest most powerful nation on the face of the Earth...but on the rare occasion that the stink of their moral decomposition catches the wind and gets noticed by the Neutered Press, the GOP is forced to scuttle out into the light and thus begins The Killdeer Strategy: Attack and distract.

Attack: The “People of faith” drivel or ripping Newsweek a new one.

Distract: Don Rumsfeld daily “what you know, you don’t know if you knew what you we knew when we went with the Army we had, y’know?” bibbling or the “What Iraqi nukes? Nobody ever said nuthing about no Iraqi nukes ” Easter egg hunt or Tom DeLay’s faux outrage at being mocked by fictional characters on a TV show about fictional crimes being investigated by fictional detectives.

If this sounds familiar to you...you probably saw it on the Nature Channel:

Unique characteristics of the Killdeer” (courtesy of the Hinterland Who’s Who website.)


Killdeer are adept at distracting intruders from their nests or young. They employ one set of tactics against browsing animals that stroll unintentionally toward the nest of young and a quite different set against those that may wilfully do real harm, such as dogs, foxes, and people. An adult bird will run with outstretched wings or fly directly toward any browsing animal that appears on the verge of walking into a nest or stepping on a chick. There are recorded instances of a cow being struck on the muzzle. Once the intruder has been turned away, the Killdeer will allow it to graze peacefully nearby.

A different defense must be used against a deliberate threat, and this defense can be used by either parent. If flying around and calling loudly does not drive the intruder away, then one or the other of the parents performs a distraction display, commonly called a broken-wing act or injury feigning. The bird crouches on the ground with one wing spread and hanging as though broken. It flops about in a piteous manner, at the same time crying kill-dee-dee-ee as though in mortal pain. The intruder is drawn towards the seemingly wounded or helpless bird, which always manages to move away, decoying the intruder farther and farther from the nest of young birds. When the enemy is well away from its intended prey, the adult Killdeer miraculously recovers and flies off. During this display, the young will have stayed perfectly still or will have scattered in all directions. In either case, they will be almost impossible to find.

Next up – if the Gods of stolen bandwidth are a smilin’ tomorrow– William Pryor’s Record. And yes, once you look through the highlights with anything like an objective eye, you can't help but ask yourself what the fuck is really up here. Pryor really is out-and-out nuts; so bad that one starts to wonder of this is really some Stalin-inspired loyalty test Bush dreamed up to see just how far up the ass of the lunatic Right the gutless, craven Moderate Republicans are willing to crawl.

Paging David Brooks.

My guess is they won’t stop until they make it all the way up past the uvula, and start tapping on the back of James Dobson's little, ferret teeth.

105 comments:

Loveandlight said...

I've known about "Killer Bill" Pryor for about a year and a half now. That guy is the American religious right's answer to Heinrich Himmler!

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See? There's the whole fucking problem...
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Those are all just distractions from God's intended path for the human race, which is to do the funky chicken on a piece of 6 lb. test monofilament stretched across Niagra Falls.

jedwards said...

tanbark you are killing me! yikes - that "armageddon marquee" comment paints a picture that just cracks me up HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH (sic), uh, sickening, really.

driftglass said...

driftglass,

What jedwards said.
Tanbark, you are one smile-makin' SOB. Glad you're on our team :-)

Tanbark said...

Drift, and J.Ed., thanks...

Wouldn't be anywhere else.

You guys have got the love, man.

Grazie.

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Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.

Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.

Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.

Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.

Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.

Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.

Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.

Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.

Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.

I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.

Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.

Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.

A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.

Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.

Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.

Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.

Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.

Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.

Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.

Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.

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Neurolinguistic Programming

In the early 1970s in America Richard Bandler, then a young college student studied the work of Fritz Perls and later Virginia Satir and found that he could reproduce their high-level therapy skills to a degree that even surprised him. Bandler seemed to have a natural ability to mimic (model) the language patterns by Virginia and Fritz.

At the University of California at Santa Cruz, Bandler who was well versed in the teachings of patterns in mathematics and computers teamed up with a college professor, John Grinder to help him understand the processes that were at work. Soon Bandler and Grinder, who used what he knew about patterns in linguistics, created a new model for personal growth called NeuroLinguistic Programming.

Bandler and Grinder had set out to model the hypnotic skills of Milton Erickson. They had astounding results. They built a communication model about human "thinking" and "processing" and used that model of how we see images, hear sounds, reproduces smells and tactile experiences in our mind to track and model the structure of subjective experiences.

Sounds very complicated but really it works very simply. Here is an example as used by Paul McKenna - probably the best & most successful hypnotist in the world.

Close your eyes and think of a negative memory. Become involved in the situation as best as you can. Feel the emotions that you felt, see the things you saw and hear the things you heard.

Now take that memory and project it onto a mental screen seeing yourself in the picture. Put a frame around the picture and view it as if it is an old photograph. Next drain all the colour from the picture and shrink the screen to the size of a matchbox.

Have the feelings associated with the picture decreased in any way?

Another good example of NLP involves Anchors. Have you ever smelt a certain perfume or aftershave and had it remind you of a certain person or situation? Gone to a certain place that brings feelings long forgotten flooding back? Or been in any situation that creates emotional responses that would not normally be associated with it? Well if you can answer yes to any of these then you have experienced anchors. Some anchors are associated with positive feelings and some with negative emotions. However, you should be aware that anchors can be consciously installed or already existing ones altered. Here is an example:

Think of a time when you were really happy. If you can't think of one then imagine something that would make you feel really happy. See what you would see, hear what you would hear and feel what you would feel. Really get into the picture and try to experience it as though it were happening now.

Now brighten the colours and make them richer. Increase the volume. Make the picture bigger, brighter, louder. That's it and more and more....

Now press your first finger against your thumb and fully experience your happy feelings. Do this everyday for 2 weeks and you will create an anchor that will instantly recreate these feelings. Whenever you want to feel like that again just press your thumb and first finger together and wham the feelings will come flooding back! Don't believe me? Just try it and see!!! lucid dreaming

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When we are born our brains are like empty computers waiting to be fed information. As we grow our peers act as our programmers, they supply us with the knowledge which we channel through the conscious mind into the subconscious (our hard drive). The subconscious mind is the biggest hard drive ever developed - it stores everything we come in contact with and by no means is all of this information of a positive nature.
All that we have heard, touched, smelt, tasted and seen are stored in the recesses of our minds. The subconscious mind holds on to this information until we need to recall it. For example when you were young your curiosity lead you to investigate your surroundings. When you approached a substance that was dangerous, such as fire, your parents or guardians would most likely have rebuked or scolded you if you ventured too near the flame. Perhaps you may even recall an incident when you were physically burned. Your subconscious mind then began to relate scolding (or pain) with the intense heat of the fire and would therefore feed the feelings of the scolding incident back to you whenever you got too close to fire again, thus acting as an early warning system.
This is the mechanism used by our brains to learn. It is also the same method employed by the mind in every situation. The subconscious mind has a tendency to emulate what it sees - it tends to replicate its environment. This is why so many people find themselves in similar relationships and situations that they saw their parents in while they were growing up. Most people also hold very strongly or similar views of their parents.
Think of a time when you gave yourself praise. What words did you use? Do you use the same words that your parents or peers used when they were praising you? The same is applicable when you scold yourself.

Watch your internal dialogue. Look at it closely. It takes diligence to change the way you think. When you notice yourself thinking a negative chose to think the opposite. This way you neutralise the negative thought. Now the think the positive thought again! You have just reversed the negative thinking in that moment and remember you only have this moment. No other time exists!
Daydream about what might be. Imagine things they way you wish them to be. If you catch yourself thinking "this is just a daydream - a fantasy" then stop! Think the opposite. It is not a daydream it is your reality. Now think it again.

By doing this simple procedure you will begin to retrain your subconscious mind to think positively and you will ultimately begin to consciously create a life that dreams are made of! hypnosis

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