Saturday, February 23, 2013

Rude Person Mocks Ridiculous Lady

For getting her drink on in public.


From Mr. Charles P. Pierce, taking a walk down the wide, well-blazed Tengrain Trail:
Before following la Noonan on her vision quest, however, let us try to stop laughing so hard at the latest caricature of the president that has emerged from the inebriates working the shop floor of her dimly lit imagination. Ladies and gentlemen: Barack Obama - Master Of Disaster!
Because Mr. Obama thrives in chaos. He flourishes in unsettled circumstances and grooves on his own calm. He spins an air of calamity, points fingers and garners support. His only opponent is a hapless, hydra-headed House. America has a weakness for winners, and Republicans just now do not look like winners. They have many voices but no real voice, and no one saying anything that makes you stop and think. Mr. Obama, on the other hand, is a singular character who tells you in measured tones that we must have measured answers.
You've all had periodic spells of lucidity over the past five years. Does this sound at all like the president you've been watching? Has there ever been a more chaos-averse politician than this guy? Hell, it took him almost his entire first term to realize the obvious fact that he was facing the forces of Bedlam across the aisle. Now we are to believe that the whole sequester thing was a clever vehicle for him to work the koon-ut-cali-fee on the political process?
As any able future students of American history will know by rote, once the Republican Party gave up the whole idea of "governing" as "just too fucking hard", they spent most of the last bit of the 20th century and  the early 21st ritually digging big, scary political deadfalls, lining them with pointy, shit-smeared economic spikes and then inviting the President Barack Obama to jump into them.

And to the dumbfounded consternation of a group then called "Liberals" (now simply refereed to as "Americans"), for much of his first term President Obama obliged them.  Until, at some point, it dawned on his administrations that the GOP had no actual "plan" for the future beyond "Gummint Bad!" and was digging these pits and inviting him to jump simply because they hated his living guts.

And so, near the end of his first term,  President Obama stopped leaping into GOP deadfalls, which freaked them completely out since 30 years of Hate Radio had dumbed them down to the point where they literally did not know how to do anything but Charge Straight Ahead Screaming no matter how many times they took one in the yams:

And so, not knowing what else to do but damn sure somebody had to jump into the Big Hole Full of Pointy Sticks or the ghost of Ayn Rand would rise from the dead to primary their asses, the GOP began cannonballing into their own deadfalls.

Then, as if the sheer hilarity of the Party of Personal Responsibly taking turns seeing  who can run right up their own ass the fastest, they expanded their list of grievances against the President to include:
  1. Refusing to hoist them out of the graves they had dug for him.
  2. Refusing to apologize for existing and winning re-election.
  3. Refusing to climb down into said grave.
  4. Refusing to pull the dirt in over himself.
Because no matter what President Obama ever actually says or does, short of resigning his office, confessing the unvarnished truth of every paranoid wingnut Bircher twitch and handing the nuclear codes over to Paul Ryan, this... how the Right will always see him.


Anonymous said...

As Nixon????

Tengrain said...

Thanks for the linky luv, old chum!