Mr. Brooks' column today is, in its own way, quite remarkable: it is an entire piece on the looming Republican Sabotage of the Global Economy without so much as a mention of the looming Republican Sabotage of the Global Economy.
Instead we get a lesson-in-three-parts explaining to Barack Obama (in a tone not unlike that of Grandpa Simpson explaining his onion belt
to a random child) exactly how Barack Obama can revise his management style to be more accommodating to Republican fanatics and imbeciles.
It ends penultimately with this sentence:
If he can overcome his aloofness and work intimately with Republicans, he may be able to avert a catastrophe and establish a model for a more realistic, collegial presidency.Which is, without a doubt, one of the top five most painfully ridiculous lies Mr. Brooks has written in his long and lucrative career of telling painfully ridiculous lies for money.
One day I shall be in a Men's Room at some conference or lecture somewhere. I shall glance up from symmetrically melting urinal ice in time to see David Fucking Brooks taking position in the stall next to mine.
At which time I will definitely turn and pee on his shoes.
For America.
UPDATE: No stranger to nuzzling the jum-jums of those above him on the Pundit Food Chain, the former Bush Speechwriter and still-inexplicably-employed David Frum of course thinks David Brooks' piece is a miracle of rare perception.
The money quote:
Listen to Brooks, he shows the way forward.Omitting, of course, the fact that the last time we followed the these Davids anywhere, it led us straight into Baghdad and catastrophe
10 comments:
Just read your response to Brookstone on RealityChex! Love it, love it, love it! We see the WURLD the same way!
Thank you for your courage-
Kate Madison
Depoe Bay, Oregon
"Ends penultimately"? It ends, then turns around and ends all over again, this time for good?
If bending over and spreading cheeks is not collegial enough, what, pray tell, would be?
John Puma
There is a new game I now play when I can muster up the stomach to read our Mr. Brooks. I read it solely to see if I can guess what you will say.
And what you say always turns out better than what I guessed.
I know he will be wearing very expensive shoes when it happens.
[singing]He's trampling down the vinyard where the grapes of wrath are stored, and the karma marches on![/singing]
Seriously, though. What will the dittobots do, I can't help but wonder, when their neighbors and (probably former after a shitload of people lose their jobs) co-workers fully recognize the fact that our brand-new shiny Greater Depression was authored solely and enthusiastically by the teabaggers? How much will the "just turn up Rush louder and insist that 2+2=5" strategy avail them then? How frightfully funny if doing so finally earned them some long-overdue punches in the mouth! How dreadfully tragic for everyone else. :-(
If there's any justice, you'll have eaten about a pound of asparagus a few hours before soiling Bobo's loafers.
I thank you in advance for your commitment to pee on his shoe, and pray the opportunity present itself soon.
So I looked up all posts tagged as "David Fuckity Fucking Fuck-cakes Brooks". The number of hits was unexpected.
Oh, gawddammit,DriftGlass... Now I have the phrase "nuzzling the jum-jums" stuck in my head.....
Mike.K.
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