Wednesday, August 17, 2005

This one goes out to Garrison Keillor



To be filed under: Things I never even thought to think about.

Via the NASA/JPL site, this is the a picture of a Martian crater, on northern Elysium Planitia.

The Barsoom Daily Pantograph Weekend Getaway Guidebook (which is published, belive it or not, every 24 hours, 39 minutes, and 35.260726 seconds...but which has to go to press 668 times a year, which plays merry hell with the staff vacation schedule) .says it...
“…is a little more than twice the diameter of the famous Meteor Crater in Arizona. It was formed by the impact and subsequent explosion of a meteorite. The image was taken by the Mars Orbiter Camera aboard the Mars Global Surveyor in July, 1998.”


So what?

So Nature never, ever wastes her forms.

Ever.

This via Mens’ Health:

One study has shown that 3 percent of women have innies. The cause: genetics. The nerve endings in breasts with inverted nipples are no different from those of any other nipples. "Often, women with inverted nipples may be more sensitive emotionally because they may feel that their nipples aren't normal," says Shirley Zussman, Ed.D., a sex therapist in New York City. Reassure her with compliments about her breasts. You can lure the nipples out if you're persistent with touching, kissing, licking, and gentle sucking.

The Devil you say!

I mean, how cool it that? That some people come with two perfect, little demi-demi-demitasse cups? All the better adapted by a certain naturally selective process to hold the honey or chocolate syrup, I say.

So for those keeping track at home, the score for this round is…

Pecksniff Bluesnose Creationists – 0.
Randy Intelligent Darwinists – 2.

And speaking for Liberal Straight Men everywhere I would like to emphasize that we are always more than happy to put in whatever extra time is necessary -- Martian or Terran -- to get the job done!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...
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driftglass said...

hubrissonic,

Well first, there was a big kerfuffel in the papers about Garrison Keillor saying the word "breast" on the radio. Apparently just the mention of it and the shadow of a possibility the FCC might get pissed caused the Shipwreck Kellys at PBS/NPS to freak out.

Visions of pledge-drives being held just to pay for mammary-related fines made 'em flip out.

And then right after that I happen across an odd article about a small percentage of women having "innie" nipples.

So far be in from be to ignore such a palpably divine suggestion as to what to write about, and when I hear "innies nipples"...well how am I supposed to ignore that?

And then I bet myself that such a thing would probably take the same form as an impact crater seen from space.

And then my brain just started riffing and took off runnin', dragging me along behind.

And as Paul Harvey sez, "Now you know the rest of the story."

triozyg said...

DG, your writing is such fun, and then to glimpse the wizard behind the curtain -- unlike in Oz, its even more fascinating!! You make it sound easy, but trust me, most of us muggles would never make these connections so elegantly.

You truly have a gift!!

triozyg said...

Oh, and I'm guessing the "removed" post was really funny ... but likely not PG-13, I'm laughing just trying to imagine what it must've said!!

Anonymous said...

DG- I think you speak for all us Liberal Straight Men, whether on Terra, Mars or Deimos, that we'll do what it takes, in whatever time zone we find ourselves in. Including the zero-G environment of interplanetary space.

Zappatero said...

that thing looks fresh.

the meteor, that is.

Anonymous said...

What is a kerfuffel, and who is, or was, Shipwreck Kelly? Drifty's passion for obscure references reminds me of Dennis Miller, whom I used to like before he drank the Kool-Aid and joined the Bushevik cult.---MftI

driftglass said...

'Shipwreck' Kelly was a world-famous flagpole sitter in the 1920's: when you're perched precariously on top of a tall flagpole, you tend to get very paranoid about every little breeze.

"Kerfuffle" is a word I picked up from Maureen Dowd (and promptly misspelled) that means a fuss or a noisy arguement.

"Maureen Dowd" is a...:-)

Anonymous said...
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