But where does the stripper go?
So I looked up this morning and noticed that it was this blog’s second birthday.
Holy crap. Two years of sassmouth.
So, first, in honor of entering the Terrible Twos, let me just say that this site will now feature a LOT more “No, no, no, no, no, I don’t wanna, no, no, no, no, I don’t wanna, no, fuck you, no, no, waaaah!, no, no, no, go away, shut up, no, waaagh!” posts.
And as a concession to the post-Flintstones-pre-Jetsons modern era we live in, I will try to Atrios those posts down to a lean, aerodynamic, no-fat, no-cal, no-sugar, no-sodium, no-caffine, no-verb, main-course-in-pill-form, three-syllable link to Digby :-) Because I know from watching the teevee that’s what all the kids want these days, what with their loud rock and roll music and Xboxes and secret Mickey Mouse Club sex rave parties.
I also understand from what we at castle driftglass hear on the wireless
that the concept of the Compleat Sentence And Paragraph Lone Blogger site is as laughably anachronistic as nine Gumby and Pokey Cartoons and as dead as three Dillingers, but as I am a creature of habit, an occasional adjective might slip through, so bear with me.
Second, I promise to continue artfully sprinkling in spelling errors, puntuational-perversions and spontaneous tense-shifts in ways that appear to the untrained eye to be completely random but are actually a massively complex letter-transposition encoding project that will eventually aggregate into of my epic poem on the tragedy of the Hay-Bunau-Varilla Treaty.
Third, I checked the astrology bit in my morning paper for my blog’s sign to see how its day would be.
At first I thought it was a Nesbitt…
Mrs O: There's not a zodiacal sign called Nesbitt...
Mrs Trepidatious: All right, Derry and Toms.
Mrs O: Aquarius, Scorpio, Virgo, Derry and Toms. April 29th to March 22nd. Even dates only.
Mrs Trepidatious: Well what does it presage?
Mrs O: You have green, scaly skin, and a soft yellow underbelly with a series of fin-like ridges running down your spine and tail. Although lizardlike in shape, you can grow anything up to thirty feet in length with huge teeth that can bite off great rocks and trees. You inhabit arid sub-tropical zones and wear spectacles.
Mrs Trepidatious: It's very good about the spectacles.
Mrs O: It's amazing.
Lastly, here is the graphic I borrowed for Post Number One.
Because I still like it.
And now, off to a long day’s labors.
Because phrases like “"Treaty that no Panamanian ever signed” and “Compagnie Nouvelle du Canal de Panama” aren’t just going to rhyme themselves.