Sunday, May 03, 2026

And Now They Have To Live The Rest of Their Lives Like a Schnook


I did this graphic twenty years ago.  Back in September of 2006.  And boy howdy, if you wanted to enjoy the good opinion of the legacy media back in 2006, you did not want to be a Liberal blogger, no sirree.  You wanna talk about cancel culture?  If you were a Liberal blogger in the early 2000s, you automatically became a media and cultural pariah,  permanently caricatured as soft-headed, terrorist-loving, Murrica-hating lunatics.

In the good, gray pages of America's Newspaper of Record, we were compared to Tom Fucking DeLay, as the nation's premier depraved and unhinged danger to democracy.

But the experience of [the malignant Tom] DeLay and the net-root DeLays in the Democratic Party amply demonstrates that means determine ends. Hyper-partisans may have started with subtle beliefs, but their beliefs led them to partisanship and their partisanship led to malice and malice made them extremist, and pretty soon they were no longer the same people.

Andrew Sullivan warned that we may become "a fifth column".  On the now-defunct Chris Matthews Show, a near-hysterical David Brooks cast us as even crazier than the crazies on the Right.  Charles Krauthammer invented the term "Bush Derangement Syndrome" just for us.     

Charles Krauthammer: Bush Derangement Syndrome is spreading.  
Published: Dec 7, 2003

For the unpardonable sin of writing truthfully and accurately about the state of the Republican party and the catastrophic trajectory it was on, by the legacy media and conservative media, we were nearly universally loathed and dismissed.  And the more it became clear that we had been right about the Right all along, the more establishment institutions wanted us to shut the fuck up and go away, because we were not telling the story they wanted told.

Thirteen years later,  in 2019, I wrote this:

And on that day I will butter my humble bread with schadenfreude as I watch the stunned indignation of my Liberal allies who were damn-fool enough to lend their credibility to their Never Trumper pals in exchange for nothing -- watch as they wake to find that their pals have not only turned on them, but have used the credibility my Liberal allies gave them as patents of nobility to stake a permanent claim in the mainstream media as the new Reasonable Center of American politics.

I shall uncork a fine, vintage "I fucking told you so" when Brian Williams and Joe Scarborough and Don Lemon and on and on and on welcome Rick Wilson and Bill Kristol and Charlie Sykes and on and on and on as heroes.  Brave truth-tellers who stood out as one of the few, clear, sane voices on either the Left or the Right during these past few crazy years.

Never Trumpers in conversation with each other.  From The Bulwark, two days ago:

Sarah Longwell:  And I... I think that... I don't know if you're familiar with the phrase people uh will forgive you for being wrong, but they will never forgive you for being right. 

Oh my yes, Sarah.  We Liberal bloggers are very familiar with that phrase.  People who have been writing about the catastrophic trajectory of the Republican party since the days when the ink on your Kenyon College diploma was still wet?  Since before you joined the Log Cabin Republicans?  People who were slandered, mocked, and ignored by the same people who now staff The Bulwark and take victory laps for "being right"?   

Yes, we are very, very, very familiar with that phrase.

But please continue.

LongwellUm, and I also think as Trump demonstrates what a threat he is to liberal democracy in this moment that a lot of the people who said "Kamala? Trump? They'll probably be about the same." are mad at us at how right we were about the threat he presented. 

This has become a consistent, predictable feature of every Bulwark podcast..  Or, rather, a key marketing and branding slogan of every Bulwark podcast as they ask for new subscribers.  Reminding everyone not only how right they were and how the Right despises them for it -- but let's let David Frum explain...

Frum:  Well, The Bulwark is indispensable and brave and your present amazing success should not cause people to forget the incredible chanciness and riskiness of the enterprise at the beginning.   And so you all deserve tremendous honor.  You made sacrifices. So did your colleagues, by the way, or your  counterparts at The Dispatch. Many of them made tremendous individual sacrifices and again it's worked out but no one knew that at the beginning...

From Capital Research,  May 14, 2025

The Bulwark: From Nonprofit to Profits

...According to the DDT Institute’s 2021 report to the IRS, the nonprofit sold The Bulwark to Center Enterprises in August 2021 for $100,000. The report also notes the firm is “more than 35%” owned by Sarah Longwell. (The DDT Institute also reported more than $1 million in expenses for The Bulwark for the months preceding the sale.)

The Bulwark website now states that it is owned by “Center Enterprises, Inc.”

The funding model is now advertising and reader support, via the Substack subscription platform, and a lot of content is behind paywalls. The basic membership is $100 annually, with a “Founding” level that provides access to additional content for $300 per year.

As of March 2025, The Bulwark reported nearly 90,000 paid Substack subscribers, which at a minimum of $100 each equates to $9 million annually (Substack takes roughly 10 percent of that.) An additional source of revenue is a YouTube page, “bringing in between $150,000 to $300,000 a month,” according to New York magazine. So that’s an additional $1.8 million or more per year.

“After several years of breaking even,” noted the New York report, “The Bulwark had its first profitable year in 2024.”

It's funny to hear people who were given millions in startup capital by angel investors, limitless promotional hits on cable news amounting to tens of millions in free advertising, op-ed gigs, book deals, speaking engagements and uplift by other A-list podcasters -- all of which is a million times more support than any Liberal bloggers and podcasters were ever offered by the same wealthy individuals and institutions -- talking about what a tremendous sacrifice it was quitting Team Evil 20 years too late.  

Every time I hear this kinda talk -- which is a near-constant refrain from every Never Trumper -- I get notes of Henry Hill bitching at the end of Goodfellas --

-- about how far his station in life was reduced once he was forced to get out of the mob and turn on all his old cronies.

Funny old world.  


I Am The Liberal Media


Thursday, April 30, 2026

32.2 Feet Per Second Squared


Although it ticks down a tiny amount at, say, the peak of Everest, 32.2 ft/s² is the average acceleration due to gravity here on planet Earth.  All the time, everywhere.

But how do I know this is true right now?  How can I be sure?  Did I personally test it today?  

No.

Did I test it yesterday? 

No.  

Will I test it tomorrow?  

No.  Don't be a pedant.  There is no need to measure it because gravity is a function of how mass warps spacetime, and so far as we are concerned, it is effectively constant.

Which is why the acceleration due to gravity on Earth is the same today as it was yesterday, and as it was in 1881 and in 1510 and 10 million years and a billion years ago.  

And,as a metaphor, this is why I personally do not react with shock every time Trump and his minions wipe their asses with the Constitution.  Or when Republicans in Congress abase themselves at his every whim.  Or when Republican voters, knowing who and what he was, nominated him three times and elected him twice and cheered on his every depraved excess.  Or that the legacy media rolled over for all of it.  Or that "respectable" institutions" sold us out and bent the knee.  Or that a substantial percentage of those minions and voters have begun looking for a lifeboat  because "[Fill in the whatever] isn't what I voted for" and "He fooled me!"

Because it all begins with the voters.

And because rage...

MAGA Gets New ‘Tears of the Left’ Whiskey

...racism...

The Republican Party Is Racist and Soulless. Just Ask This Veteran GOP Strategist.

...violence...

Megyn Kelly: I'm supposed to feel sorry for Alex Pretti - but I don't

...corruption...

Trump’s Profiteering Hits $4 Billion

...stupidity...

What Underlies the G.O.P. Commitment to Ignorance?

...paranoia...

20 Conspiracy Theories Trump Has Pushed Before and During His Presidency

...white nationalism...

How White Supremacy Returned to Mainstream Politics

...a contempt for facts and reason...

When a cult goes mainstream: Inside the toxic psychological engine of Trump’s MAGA movement

...a bone-deep horror at the thought of ever being held responsible for any of the evil that they do...

‘Disappointed,’ ‘Surprised,’ ‘Betrayed’: 12 Trump Voters on What Has Gone Wrong

...and a double scoop of authoritarianism...

Trump fits the bill of an authoritarian. But so do many Americans

...are the components that Republican leaders and Conservative media have been breeding into the party base for decades.  

I know this because, like you, for my entire adult life I have watched with growing alarm (and written about it on this blog for 21 years) as Republican leadership, Conservative media and the legacy media all pitched in to assemble this doomsday machine.

Their depravity is not a fluke or a fever.  It has become a political constant. And their trajectory is ever-downward.  Something we now have to factor in to every strategy and decision.  It is impossible to imagine Republicans ever again acting in good faith about anything.   Ever rising above their barbarity.  Ever giving a good goddamn about this country or its future, or ever backing even slightly off of the raving language of bile, resentment and leering sadism that has become their Mother Tongue.   

And so all our plans devolve into disaster mitigation.  Trying to predict what grievous wounds they will inevitably inflict on civilization next and how we can best prepare ourselves for their acts of grunting, bitching, Bible-wrapped savagery.

Both Sides Don't 





Tuesday, April 28, 2026

One of These...


...is the ruthless agent of a rapacious, litigious, mercantile theocracy driven by the principle "Once you have their money, never give it back." 

The other is Brunt, a Liquidator for the Ferengi Commerce Authority.


Both Sides Don't 





Friday, April 24, 2026

Things That Make You Doubt Whether You Exist At All


This exchange between former Trump spokesmodel turned Bulwark employee, Sarah Matthews, and Tim  Miller made me check my blogroll and archives to make sure the entire history of the Liberal blogosphere/ podcast universe really existed.  Or had I hit my head on a low-slung door casing in 1998 and just dreamed it all up.

Matthews:  Don't get me wrong like of course there's a little part of me that thinks internally of course it feels good to be right but like I didn't want to be right about all of this. 

Tim Miller: I did and that's one way that we're different. And I don't want to be immodest or anything, but it does feel like as I survey the news that we're going to go to this morning, like that the most extreme cringe version of Never Trumpism uh seems like it was it was correct. Like, whatever person you have in your mind, you're like, "This person like hates Trump so much that some of their takes are even a little bit like, you know, make you wince a little bit because they've gone so far around the bend." Like that person, whoever that person is in your mind, was like way more right than any anybody who tried to say like,  "Let's call it balls and strikes." Like, let's see, you know, he's he had some good points on this or that. 

Matthews:  And now obviously like you know five years of being the on the anti-Trump side and yeah feels feels good to know that we were right.

Sure she did all the things and enjoyed all the perks and told all the lies and backed all the madness, but she reassures Tim, in her hip-hop heart (tm New York Times Pitchbot) she was never really down to clown.  She was never really bought in to all the MAGA stuff.  Deep down she knew things weren't right.

(So lemme understand.  Back then, when she worked for Donald Trump, on a day-to-day, hour-to-hour basis she was just lying about what she truly believed.  And doing it so expertly that no one could tell that she never believed the things that were coming out of her mouth.  

But now she's telling the unvarnished truth?  And you can trust that because...?  C'mon people.  It's like no one has ever seen Double Indemnity. The Strange Love of Martha Ivers. The File on Thelma Jordon. Or  No Man of Her Own, )

Well none of those questions were on the table.  Instead Tim did the podcast equivalent of chucking her under the chin and telling her, it's OK kiddo.  As the official brand-ambassador for the "pro-democracy coalition", I can assure you, all is forgiven. You're on The Bulwark payroll now, and we absolve everybody.   

Everybody?

Well --- not everybody.  There are two groups whose transgressions are so grievous that they can never be excused.

The first group is one guy.  Tucker Carlson.  Who has always been lying, skeevy con man who'll say anything to advance his personal and political fortunes.  All his "apology" amounts to is another MAGA rat scurrying down the-rat line of a sinking ship.  Never trust this guy.  

The second group are... Liberals.  Especially Liberal bloggers and podcasters who had the poor taste to have been. inconveniently, 100% right about the Right since long before there was ever such a thing as  The Bulwark or a Never Trumper.  Since long before Trump was even a thing.  

If the Bulwark crew had it within their power to wish all of us with long memories and detailed files ... 

... all into the cornfield, they'd do it before close of business.

But since that is beyond their abilities, they settle for pretending we never existed, except as straw men whose imaginary follies prompt endless eye-rolling from the savvy set.



I Am The Liberal Media




Thursday, April 23, 2026

Professional Left Podcast Episode 988: Schrödinger's Alliances


"The only governing rule that we all recognize is: always sit close to an exit and never trust a man who doesn't sweat."  --  Dr. Hunter S. Thompson


















Wednesday, April 22, 2026

Schrödinger’s Alliance

Now that Never Trumpers have been handed control over gatekeeping and party-discipline duties for the Democratic Party,  I try very hard to be a good Liberal and never question any of the decisions our Never Trump supervisors hand down.

I got mah mind right, boss!

For example, I understand that we're no longer the "Democratic Party".  Now our brand is the "pro-democracy coalition" which is supposed to make it easier for people who despise us and everything we hold dear to join our "coalition" without having to worry that they might get some of that icky "woke" stuff on them.

So every day I get up and turn portraits of Franklin Roosevelt, Harry Truman and JFK to the wall to remind myself that "Democratic Party" is oldspeak now.  Maybe even crimethink!  

And having been sternly lectured on the Never Trump Iron Clad Rule of Alliances no less than 10,000 times over the past ten years (including from people whose MAGA derangement has since metastasized and swallowed them whole) I try to toe the line and do as I'm told.  

But, to quote Captain Terrell from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan:

Sir, that is difficult. I... try to obey, but...

For example, without guidance from my Never Trump handlers I'm all at sea about what I should do with this new information about Tucker Carlson.

From The Hill:

Tucker Carlson ‘sorry for misleading people’ with Trump support

Pundit Tucker Carlson is expressing regret for voicing support for President Trump.

Carlson, who has been a sharp critic of Trump’s war in Iran, said during a recent episode of his podcast and online show that prominent people on the right who backed Trump ahead of the 2024 election are “implicated” in what’s going on in the Middle East.

“So I do think it’s like a moment to wrestle with our own consciences. You know, we’ll be tormented by it for a long time. I will be,” he said. “And I want to say I’m sorry for misleading people and it was not intentional. That’s all I’ll say.”

You can see why my simple, Liberal brain is all fuzzy and confused. Because a plain-text reading of the fine print of the Never Trump Iron Clad Rule of Alliances makes it very clear that Carlson cannot be welcomed into the "pro-democracy coalition" as a mere Adam Kinzinger-grade ally. No, no. According to established precedent, given that he is a high-status Person of Influence among the MAGA meatbags, he is to be automatically field-promoted to Liz Cheney Super-Ally status! 

 A class of ally whose most transparently ridiculous and self-serving excuses -- "I wuz fooled!" -- are to be treated like the Letters of Transit in Casablanca. They cannot be rescinded. Not even questioned.

So where does that leave me?  I mean, I certainly don't want to run afoul of the new protocols, so are my old Carlson graphics now potential thoughtcrimes?  

Is it enough if I just burn them in my back yard, or will special depots for their disposal be set up and supervised by Never Trumpers?  

Also, does this automatically move Carlson to the front of the pack in the 2028 Democratic pro-democracy coalition presidential race, or does he need to appear on both Rogan and The Bulwark before that decision is made?  Is there a fund I should be contributing to?  And until then does Carlson's status exist in some indeterminate quantum state?  A Schrödinger's alliance? 

Again, please extend a thousand pardons to my Never Trump supervisors for all of this.  Clearly my opinion is worth something or I never would have merited 10,000 lectures on what a danger to democracy I was for not trusting the honorable intentions of Glenn Beck, Ann Coulter, Michael Cohen and so forth.  And since no less than the fate of democracy hangs in the balance, I want to make sure that I'm on firm, Never Trump-approved footing, and at the moment I have no idea where firm footing lies.  

In fact, when it comes to reconciling our Never Trumpers' wise Rule of Alliances with what I know of Tucker Carlson, my confusion is such that you could say I'm having a Star Trek "Norman" moment.

Yes, you could definitely say that.  


No Half Measures





Tuesday, April 21, 2026