"Fucking myrrh?
What da fuck am I supposed ta do wit fucking myrhh?"
A Chicago ChristmasFor unto youze is born dis day
in da City of
Da Mare an open Senate Seat,
which ain't just coffee-and-doughnuts my friend.
And dis shall be big fucking dollar sign unto youze ;
Ye shall find da
cush wrapped in
mazuma,
Which was just lyin' dere, I swear ta God.
...cush wrapped in mazuma...
ReplyDeleteMoney wrapped in more money? How delightfully decadent!
Youze gonna have to give me a break, I'z nevah really been to da East Coast an da only time I'z been to Chicago wuz to to get a fookin'n crash course in runnin' my fookin'n ass off from one gate too's anuddah in the fookin' aighaport, but I t'ought youze waz talkin' Brooklyn or sumpthin'.
ReplyDeleteY'all talk like dat in Chi Town too?
Blago is going to get some music lessons where he is going.
Anyways, de fookin' idiot is goin' down.
Fitzgerald done Fuck around.
Chicago has it's share of dozers.
ReplyDeleteDees guys, doze guys, dem guys. da tree wise guys over by dare.
Dey stick out cuz dey hang out.
Two or tree of `em stop by every now in den to tell youze guys what to do.
The epicenter of dare woild. Ware dey live and woik useta be Bridgeport. Nowadays dey hang furder west around Elmwood Park.
(Ah sure, by Johnnies!)
Woild events wud be simpler if youze guys wud know wad it means.
Phugginnay.
Dean,
ReplyDeleteA corruption tur-duck-en. Or, as it shall soon be known, a Chicago hat dag.
Bustednuckles,
Now dat da Preziden is from here, ever'body else iz da ones wit da accent :-)
Rehctaw,
Werd
I'm not Bill Maher, but, New Rule: People without foreheads can't be leaders anymore.
ReplyDeleteChicagoians! Take to the streets! We need all those people who were at Grant Park on November 4 to go and stand in front of Blago's house and sing Twisted Sister songs until he runs screaming to Boca Raton. I know its fucking cold outside, but us downstaters are counting on you to get your big fucking shoulders outside and do something!
ReplyDeleteAwash wit mazuma
ReplyDeletefor da seat that dey seek
The little Guv Blago
goes 'Me wet da beak'
Da rubes, and da wiseguys
trow da cash on da tray
The little Guv Blago
knows dat it ain't hay
Reportas following
dere tails he does shake
but little Guv Blago
heres 'Use on the take'
;>)
I've been meaning to say, DG. You're not out of a jaaab if yer a gud writer an' shit. And youse are da best writer guy out dere. Youse kinda guys get the book contracts by Valentine's Day, my friend. That'll take care of youse having any, ya know, time on your hands. I'm just sayin'.
ReplyDelete