Tuesday, June 03, 2014

A Sound of Blunder

It seems someone told Senator Penny-Ante McCarthy that there was once an author named Ray Bradbury.

Even Tuesday, Reid continued to his campaign against the Kochs. "They have all these phantom organizations," Reid said. "They must have 15 different phony organizations that they use to pump money into the system."

McConnell said he had little patience for the political stagecraft taking place.

"Everyone on this panel knows this proposal will never pass Congress," McConnell said. "This is a political exercise to stir up one party's political base so they'll show up in November by complaining loudly about certain Americans exercising their free speech and associational rights."

Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, predicted the Democrats' amendment would allow critics to use the Constitution to ban books and films, and likened the move to repealing the First Amendment, which guarantees free speech.

"Ray Bradbury would be astonished because we are seeing 'Fahrenheit 451' Democrats today," Cruz said, invoking the novel about book burning.
Actually, Cruz is invoking the right author, but the wrong story.

See, over in An Adjacent Universe -- where they have created a commercially viable form of time travel -- for the right price, Time Safari, Inc. makes money taking rich, bloodthirsty assholes on a shooting parties to previous eras where they can kill a variety of apex predators to which modern humans no longer have access.
Beyond proper identification and payment in advance, Time Safari, Inc. has one immutable rule: Once you arrive at your destination, stay on the path they've laid out for you. You walk along a slip of anti-gravity metal, touching nothing, and only killing the animal they have selected for you -- an animal which they know in advance was destined to die anyway, minutes later.

Sadly one day, one rich, bloodthirsty asshole freaks out, steps off the path and accidentally crushes a butterfly. 

And when the hunting party returns, they find a new reality where things are so fucked up that a buffoon like Ted Cruz is an actual Senator elected from an actual American state.


bowtiejack said...

Kudos, DG!

Great stuff.

We live in a time when Cruz, Sarah Palin, Virginia Foxx, Louie Gohmert, Rand Paul, Paul Broun and so many other obvious assholes are given serious attention that it probably foretells something. I don't like to think what.

Anonymous said...


Given the sheer number of ignorant, malicious, lying, pestilent creatures that now populate the so called conservative party in our governmental bodies, and the unbelievably stupid, ignorant, ass backwards things they say, it’s hard to believe that the planet hasn’t imploded due to the gravitational force of their stupidity and ignorance.

I know, to them it’s a feature not a bug: being ignorant for the pride of being ignorant. But it sure is painful to watch.