Sunday, December 03, 2006

The Twelve Days


Of Zappadan.

(A little something for my pal Blue Gal.)


On the first day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
A mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the second day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the third day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the fouth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the fifth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the sixth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the seventh day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the eighth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Eight Dwarfs a’ Breeding
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the ninth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Nine Mudsharks Mything
Eight Dwarfs a’ Breeding
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.



On the tenth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Ten Real Ponchos
Nine Mudsharks Mything
Eight Dwarfs a’ Breeding
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the eleventh day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Eleven Tycoons Flossing
Ten Real Ponchos
Nine Mudsharks Mything
Eight Dwarfs a’ Breeding
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a mint copy of Apostrophe.


On the twelfth day of Zappadan
Ms. Cream Cheese sent to me:
Twelve Little Jockies
Eleven Tycoons Flossing
Ten Real Ponchos
Nine Mudsharks Mything
Eight Dwarfs a’ Breeding
Seven Vids a’ Sliming
Six Weasels Ripping
Titties and Beer!
Four Nasty Poodles
Three Tacky Pamphlets
Two Stinky Tootsies
and a
mint
copy
of
A-Pos-Tro-Phe.

(Thanks for the erratum catches, preznit_giv_me_turkee.)

13 comments:

Fran / Blue Gal said...

I don't give two stinky tootsies WHAT Drifty says, he is the most wonderful there is.

Fran / Blue Gal said...

Oh, and before I forget. Anyone else who wants to write a post for Frank in honor of Zappadan (ooh you can be just like Driftglass!), the details are here at the blog The Aristocrats.

Anonymous said...

isn't that apostrophe?
and you have 2 first days

mark hoback said...

We were going along okay, and i was starting to sing along, just a little, but then we kind of ran out of days of Zappadan, so I kind of understand how the Muslim kids feel when they open their Ramadan stocking on the seventeenth or eighteenth day of Ramadan and find nothing there but emptiness.

Anonymous said...

Driftglass, you're a man after my own heart. Zappa and Tom Waits are my two favorite composers/musicians/entertainers of all time.

I miss Frank so much, especially in these turbulent times. There's never been another one like him. Fortunately, he put out enough material in his horribly foreshortened life that I'll be able to hear new and interesting things in his music for the rest of my life. But I need MORE!

Why oh why does the Zappa Family Trust refuse to release more of his archived material? It's killing me! There's a ton of film and video footage they have of the early 70s bands, and they won't relese it.

Anonymous said...

Back in 1986, only one saw the Theocratic Fascists coming.

Btw, Assclowns of the Week is back. In #52, we review the idiocies of George Bush, "Sixteen Words" Hadley, Steve King, Mort Kondracke, the Atlanta PD and much, much more!

Anonymous said...

I want to take this opportunity to post again my favorite Zappa quote:

"Remember, there's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over."---from "Heavenly Bank Account" :)

Anonymous said...

Great googlie-mooglie! Have a Happy Zappadan.

Anonymous said...

Sweeeet! Be careful The Central Scrutinizer doesn't get you for "doing wrong things" ;)

Anonymous said...

Shrink tubing, with a hair dryer?

Anonymous said...

I got a pristine copy of that vinyl. Only to be looked at, never touched.

Anonymous said...

Billy was a mountain.

Ethel was a tree growing out of his shoulder.

Anonymous said...

Ah...an early Holi-Zappa-Dan Presint for yer Blue Gal!

Great Job...and Just in time for the Weasels Ripping Parade!